Aku No Hana
by MikiraNanami
Summary: Hana has always been a normal girl living her life comfortably in Edo, Japan. She couldn't watch her mother slowly dying without help and went on her way to find it. She only forgot that Kyoto . She only forgot that Kyoto is a dangerous place to travel alone to, but luckily for her the Shinsengumi are there to protect her. That's just the beginning {Being transferred to Wattpad}
1. Claims

***…Aku No Hana…***

Dear reader,

Before we start on our adventure, I want to claim some rights.  
I do not own any of the Hakuouki characters, they belong to Otomate and !dea factory.  
I only own Namani Hana, Nanami Maru and Misukatse Hanabi.

The story will follow similar events like the story of Hakuouki, Demon of the fleeting blossom. The Characters Chizuru Yukimura and Kodo Yukimura are replaced by my own characters Nanami Hana and Misukatse Hanabi. Once again I do not own any of the things created by otomate and !dea factory.

{Explanations before starting.}

The time period is just to give you an idea and it's similar to the game, it has no efficient meaning only to show you when it happened.

The story might seem similar, but the events will be different as you might read later on.

The characters have their own personal minds that were created by how I would think they would act, I didn't want them to stray too much from their original performance.

The main characters are also the same and will not chance until I find some other plot to get the main character to fall for.

This is a work of fiction and it has nothing to do with real life nor any event that has taken place in the time period it's been placed.

So without further ado, have fun reading and remember to support the story by your Reviews.

Please enjoy my story and if something doesn't seem right, tell me by either sending me a private message or by reviewing!

Thank you for your patience. \\(^,^)/


	2. An Encounter At Night

**{April 1870, night time.}**

_The sound of explosions and swords clashing together in a fight mixed up with the already loud noises of the rain. The air smelled of blood and the puddles of water caused by the rain slowly turned a grim red color. _

_"__Please don't!" As the woman's voice began to tremble, a muscular yet delicate hand raised his way to her wet cheek. "Love, I'm not afraid anymore. I can't let you stay here with those monsters.." After his last words he began to cough up blood, grabbing his right side out of pain. He had fought of most enemies by himself. He felt tired, hurt and afraid of losing his treasure. "Leave at once and don't look back!" The woman knew the words of that man were something she couldn't refuse. She hesitated for a bit before turning fully and running away from everything. _

_As she got further and further away from the scene her hearth began to break. Her love was fighting for her, for this country. She had to survive to protect what they had. "I'll keep our child safe.." Where her last words to the man she once loved. _

**{May 1887, Morning.}**

My eyes were focused on the ceiling above me. Its beauty calling out to me. the memory of the night before was still lingering on my mind. Everything had happened so fast and I had no idea how to take it all in.

My hand brought itself to my chest. The part that was bandaged so I could travel through the country. Inside it held my precious letter, the only clue I had to finding that person. The memory of yesterday began to surface again.

**{Last night.}**

_The clouds had covered the moon. My legs giving it them all to keep running. I knew that the city was dangerous at night, strange people might roam the dark alleyways and abandoned parks. I was almost out of breath, but I had to keep going. _

_"__Come back here!" For some unearthly reason two masterless samurai began chasing me, my moneybag on their mind. My speed was hardly matched by theirs as they quickly began to catch up to me. In an attempt to get away I made an unnatural turn into an alleyway. My legs twisting while trying to get in line with my body. The turn was sharp enough for the two ronin to run passed it, before quickly turning back to chasing me. I ran as quickly as I could through the alley making sharp turns and trying to avoid dead ends. I spotted a hiding place not far from me and with the ronin still behind it might be my only option for now. my legs were already trembling with exhaustion and if I ran even further I could pass out from lack of oxygen. I took the chance to hide behind a conveniently placed woodpile and held my breath. My heartbeat racing in my chest, I just hoped it wasn't loud enough to be heard. The feet that were chasing me were running passed. The noise slowly disappeared. When I thought it was alright to breathe again I let out the air while simultaneously relaxing. _

_As I was about to leave my hiding spot I felt a strong rough hand grab my shoulder, only to lift me up moments later. "There you are." The ronin's teeth were yellow and his breath smelled of liquor and rot. The woodpile collapsed under the force of my weight making the loudest noise it could possibly make in the middle of the night. I secretly hoped someone would check it out before anything bad would happen. My expression held both fear and anger, trying my best not to fall apart. "Hand over the coins." His breath made its way into my nostrils and while I was trying not to breathe it in he grabbed my moneybag with one of his dirty hands. _

_"__Let go of that!" My anger took over and I almost yelled the words. I was trying my best not to speak, to make sure my secrets were kept, but he made me mad. The man's face lighted up from my words, as if he had found a new toy to play with. "What's this, a woman wearing men's clothes.." He threw me against the wall and looked at me with leering eyes. I couldn't tell what his intentions were, but with eyes like that it couldn't be good for me. _

_With the threat of being cut down I moved my right hand to my katana. Glaring up at the man approaching. The click of it getting out of my sheath was clearly audible in the dark silent night. The sound even drew the man back a little. His face went from confident to that one of surprise and back. "I see you have a weapon for yourself, tell me why is a woman dressed like a man?" He too grabbed the hilt of his sword and unsheathed it to the point the blade was barely visible. "It's none of your business." I glared at him. He just wanted my money, my life was unimportant and he would just kill me when he had it anyways. I wasn't telling a complete stranger what my plans were just yet. _

_"__Alright, so you think you can take me on with your puny little knife?" A smile gradually made its way onto his mud covered face. He unsheathed the full length of his katana like it was the easiest thing he could possibly do. His face was full of amusement while he licked his lips. My stomach twisted at this sight. He wasn't afraid to kill me here on the spot and he would probably enjoy it. I unsheathed my katana, but looking at his I probably stood no chance. My arms were untrained and I hardly even lifted a sword before going on this trip. The only thing I wanted was to find a man that could possibly safe my mother. _

_My eyes were focused on the man's movement he didn't even strike a pose, he just stood there his dark unwashed hair sticking to his face. But before anything could happen a scream of agonizing pain filled the small alleyway. Both the ronin and I were shocked by what happened just inches from our position. The second ronin that had been following the other had a sword straight through his chest. Behind it was the image of a man with a blue coat. His hair was tied back into a ponytail, but the color of his hair was something I'd never seen before. It was snow-white, the tip of it covered in something dark red. My eyes began to portray pure fear once he opened his eyes. The color of blood filled his eyes. It was dark red and almost glowing in the moonlight. His face portrayed pure joy while he pulled his sword out of the lifeless body. The man fell limp to the ground his face still in pain from when he was alive. The blue coated man didn't even mind that he was already death, once he was on the ground he began to stab the lifeless body of my pursuer. The only thing I could do was stand there and watch. My stomach turning after every strike. _

_"__What the hell!" The man before me had seen it all, his face both disgusted and fearful. He quickly turned his fear into anger once he noticed the man didn't pay attention to him. With his sword still at hand he walked forwards, ready to strike. I watched it all happen in what felt like slow-motion. How the ronin had put his sword through the man's chest and how it didn't affect his movement at all. The bleu coated man just laughed it off and while he stopped for a moment he spoke some words I thought I'd never hear with this much joy. "Blood.. I want Blood!" With a shrill laughter he lifted his sword and without hesitation sliced the man down. _

_I stood there terrified and unable to move. I did notice the man walking my way, but I was blinded by the fact that he just murdered two people in cold blood. His eyes were haunting me and his face of pure pleasure made me uneasy. With the last of my sanity I grabbed my katana and held it in front of me. I had to do something to keep myself alive. I couldn't die yet, I had to find him. _

_I held my breath thinking of some way to disappear, but before I had a change to think it through the man had lifted his sword. I had barely any time to move from it, causing my right arm to be sliced by his weapon. The pain was bearable, but the blood that had been spilled made the man even more exited. He began to move in for another strike, but before that could happen an unfamiliar man with the most beautiful dark hair had put a sword through the crazy man's chest. The man collapsed right before me, leaving the stray drips of blood to strike my face. _

_I could only stand there, frozen. The man held no emotion for that time. His dark blue eyes were now focused on mine. "It's not fair of you to act this fast, Saito." Another man appeared out of nowhere. His short brown hair was tied into a knot behind his head. His emerald eyes sharp and threatening. "Where is the fun in that." His way of speaking was scary, the look on his face suggesting he rather had me killed so he wouldn't have to deal with the aftermath. "Has he seen it all?" Both of them wore identical blue coats. Still wary about it all I began to find a way out of it all. There was hardly any escape available, but going against them would end up in my death, so I had no choice but to stand still. Listening to their conversation that was for now one sided. "It appears so." The man dubbed Saito finally spoke, his ocean blue eyes now sliding to the man besides him. His appearance was calm and refined, almost as if he belonged to a noble family. _

_Once I thought it he pulled his face closer to inspect my reaction. I was still too afraid to move or even speak to them. The fact they killed the murderer should have been a relieve for me, but it only made me even more wary. "Souji." The man before me closed his eyes for a moment and pulled back, revealing a man who I thought could be a leader. His whole being yelled out authorization, strong willed and honest. His long black hair had been weaving in the slight breeze, his blue coat slightly moving with it. His eyes were sharp and looking straight through me. I was sure he was someone important, someone I should be friendly with, but I had no time to inspect him any further. My eyes began to get heavy, my head dizzy and my legs collapsed under my weight. All the impressions and running had left me worn out. My eyes closed and I passed out on the sandy floor._

**_{Present time.}_**

The door slight open, bringing me back to the present world. My eyes focused on a familiar looking man with beautiful ocean blue eyes. I was not scared, but I knew he had nothing good to report. I passed out yesterday, meaning they had to bring me back here. They could have just left me among the dead men, but they brought me here. A place where no woman has ever stepped food in. A place dangerous and yet reliable enough for the people to let them exist. The Shinsengumi headquarters.


	3. The Shinsengumi

***…The Shinsengumi…***

{May 1887, Late afternoon.}

I sat in my room all day waiting for something to happen. Maybe a burst through the door or maybe death by the food I ate, but none of that happened. I should have ran away when I had the change. My hair was bounded in a pony-tail and was just about reaching my back. They hadn't figured out I was a woman yet or they didn't care. I might look like a boy now, but once I was a woman living my normal life in Edo. I never knew who my father was, but my mother cared for me and was always smiling. She worked hard and then she suddenly fell ill. I knew I needed to help her no matter what and went on a search for the man called, Misukatse Hanabi.

"I.. is anyone out there?" I heard some ruffling sounds and it began to frighten me. I could hear a sigh coming from the door and it slid open. A figure approached me and binds my arms with a robe. "Excuse my rudeness." His hair was messy and he wore something that looked like a green priests uniform. He smiled kindly and helped me stand. "My name is Susumu Yamazaki, I will be taking you to the meeting." He led me out of the room and through a long messy hallway. It smelled of sweat and dirt as if it hadn't been cleaned in years. "Excuse my intrusion." He bowed his head and placed me in the middle of a group of people. They all watched carefully and observed my status.

"I believe you are the one they brought back yesterday." An older man with a kind expression looked me straight in my eyes. He seemed somewhat like an alpha even though his speech didn't match. "Unfortunately I can't tell what to do just yet." A short chuckle sounded from my left side and I saw how the man called Okita leaded back against the wall, smiling for some reason. "I know we can strip him and make him walk around naked." The words shocked me and I shook my head. "No! no please no stripping." My voice was in a panic because if they did indeed strip me I would be discovered and what would they do to me then. The man called Okita began to laugh out loud and watched me panicky look around for something to hold on to. "Don't worry, we won't do that, Okita." With one look of the older man, Okita stopped and watched. "My name is Isami Kondou, I'm the leader of the shinsenguni, might I know yours?" It was as if he didn't fit in with the guys around me. He looked kind and more like a father figure than any. "Nanami Hana." I finally spoke and my voice was soft to not let them hint on me being a woman. "We should just expose of him." De one from last night, his purple eyes were staring intently at me as if ready to kill. "Wha What!" I looked away scared and backed up a bit, but I was surrounded so I gave up.

"Well well, a real man should except him death gracefully." A man with long red hair turned my way. His outfit looked different from the others, more wild and he wasn't wearing any swords. "Harada, stop giving him frights you guys." The man called Kondou recalled and I let out a small breath. "I.. I'm sorry for seeing the incident, but I really need to find this man, please at least let me meet him first." Everyone looked at me as if I said something shocking and a man with glasses killed the silence. "I see, making a deal with the captors, are you now." His hand was hanging limply at his side as the other was moving up his glasses. He had half long brown hair that just reached his shoulders. "I.. I'm not." I tried but knew no one would care either way. "Sannan is right." A smaller boy about my age spoke up. His long messy hair was bonded in a ponytail and his blue eyes stared at me as if he was looking for something. "You should be more mature." Another guy began to laugh his body looked massive and he had almost nothing to cover up his chest. "What are you saying Heisuke, who needs to be mature now." His face was covered in a green bandana that held his brown hair from his eyes. He clapped his hand on the boys back and he bounced forward almost hitting the floor with his head. "Shut up Shinpachi!" I watched as their laugh turned into an angry glare and they were preparing to stand.

"Heisuke, Shinpachi. Calm yourself and listen." The demon commander spoke and they both calmed down looking away from each other. "This man is looking for Mitsukatse Hanabi." The room felt suddenly a lot more tense and I looked around the faces that looked normal just a moment ago. "You mean he's looking for Mitsukatse, the one who created the water of.." Before he could say anymore the massive man hit him on the head and he looked hurt. "Auw, Shinpachi what's your deal!" I knew what he was going to say, but since everyone was insisting to keep the boy quiet I did the same. "Heisuke, do you want to get in trouble." The man without a sword looked down to the ground, but gave of enough killing intent to make Heisuke back off. "Forget what you just heard and tell us shy you want to find him." The demon commander spoke and watched me carefully. "I.." I began and followed.

"My mother fell ill a month ago, the last letter she got was from a man called Mitsukatse Hanabi. He was telling about how he couldn't fulfill his promise and that she should keep herself save. He wrote about a powerful potion that could cure open wounds." Right as I was at the point to tell them what it was called I closed my mouth. I knew that that word was forbidden since the boy was hit over it.

"So that means you have some connection to all of this." Kondou spoke breaking the silence. "What should we do with him now?" Everyone was thinking, I could tell, but I wasn't sure if I would be alright staying silence. "Excuse me, but do you know that man?" Everyone woke up from their thoughts and waited for someone to start. "Yes, we know of him. I can't tell you the details, but trust me you don't want to meet him alone." Kondou said and his eyes shifted to the man with glasses. His eyes widened for a moment before he grabbed his lifeless arm.

"I'm sorry.." I spoke towards the man called Sannan. He looked surprised for a moment before giving me a brief smile. "Why are you apologizing?" Heisuke looked at me as if looking for some kind of hint to what I was thinking. "Heisuke, you should just stay quiet." The sword less man spoke. "Really Harada, you too.." Heisuke seemed to look down sad and pouted. "I'm not a child you know." The man called Harada began to laugh followed by Shinpachi.

"Well, we can't really do anything at the moment. For now stay in your room until we have a final decision made." Kondou stood up followed by Okita and Saito. The demon commander and Sannan left as well and I was left in the hands of the three man called Heisuke, Shinpachi and Harada. The man that brought me here, Susumu Yamazaki had left the moment he brought me in. "Uhm.." I could tell they were thinking of a way to dispose of me. They watched every move to find something they could kill me for or at least the two older man did. Heisuke was just looking curious and maybe even glad to see he wasn't the only boy in here anymore. "We don't need to kill him, do we?" Heisuke said a bit confused. "Who knows.." Harada leant backwards leaning on his hands. "If he does something foolish he will end up death." Shinpachi added. "Ca.. can I ask you something?" I looked over the three guys and waited for permission.

"Is it true that the shinsengumi are called the Wolfs of Mibu?" Somehow my question came to a surprise to them. "And the person you call demon commander, what is his name?" Maybe I am going a bit too far, but since I will be killed anyway I could at least know the people that would do the act.

"So many questions." Harada noticed and looked me death in the eyes. His eyes narrowing to show his annoyance. "I am not allowed to answer, if you want to know go to the demon commander himself." Somehow it didn't make sense. I wasn't able to leave my room and I surely wasn't authorized to just walk around on my own. "I can't leave my room, nor can I do anything else here, so please just answer the last question, I want to know the name of the man that is going to end my life." Harada's eyes widened in shock and he began to laugh. "What a brave little kid, Heisuke you could learn from him!" Shinpachi was laughing as well and looking at Heisuke I saw him look angrily at the two men laughing. Then a loud noise sounded from the courtyard and the men all stopped to look in that direction. "It seems someone foolish came to our hideout. Gripping his sword Shinpachi stood up and walked over to the door only to be beaten by an unfamiliar man standing on the other side. His golden hair was shining with the left over sunlight that still filled the sky, but what I noticed even more were his blood red eyes. The same red as that of the man I encountered last night. "Who the hell are you!" Shinpachi drew his sword, but only to be kicked away by the blonde haired man. As Shinpachi hit the floor Heisuke and Harada stood up angrily. Their weapons ready for the fight. "What the hell, bastard!" Heisuke launched forward, but was blocked by the man's sword as he tried to slice at his troth. "Damn you!" He sounded angry and beaten at the same time.

"I have no time for you worms." The man began to speak his voice was icy, but calm and he had no worries keeping Heisuke at a distance. "Hey now, don't get to cocky." Harada held on to a spear and launched at the man as well, but he easily jumped back and looked straight at me. "I have come to take what's mine."


	4. Days To Come

***…Days To Come…***

{May 1887, Night time.}

Harada sniffled and pointed his spear back at the enemy. "And what actually might that be?" Again slicing forward the man dodged every move he made. Then as if the wind had carried him he disappeared. "Where did he go?" Heisuke was still standing just before the door as the man reappeared right in front of me. I backed away, but he was too fast and grabbed onto my arm. He gave me a brief and sly smile before he knocked the hilt of his sword in my ribs. I leaned forward as I could feel the air leave me. Without anything to grab on I lost the will to stand.

Before I could fall to the ground a pair of strong and cold arms lifted me upwards against an unfamiliar chest. With an arm around my back and the other holding my head in place I could hear him whisper. "I've have come to take you, Nanami Hana."

"What the hell do you think you're doing!" Heisuke launched at the man with his sword steadily in his hands. I was still weak from the blow and couldn't move. I wasn't used to fights and I only learned the basics. The man moved fast and pulled out his katana blocking Heisuke's attack as if it was nothing. "Foolish creature." He pushed Heisuke back and placed me against the wall. He then looked at Heisuke, ready to kill him. Heisuke looked at him without fear and only bloodlust.

"Heisuke, enough." The demon commander appeared from the doorway and walked inside as if he was curtain to kill the man. "What is the meaning of this." He shot angry glares at the man who just seemed to be unfazed. "I see." The man spoke calmly and pointed his sword at him. "Who are you!" The man in front of me narrowed his eyes for a moment. "Why ask a name when you don't have one yourself." De demon commander looked a bit troubled, but more annoyed than when he had met me. "Toshizo Hijikata." The demon commander's name suited him, but it was hardly the time for admiration. "Chikage Kazama." When he stated his name Hijikata launched forward and the fighting began. The moment he slashed the man named Kazama blocked it and it became a play of defense offence. There was no contact to the body, only a fierce battle between two swords. The sounds of metal on metal began to wake me from my trance and I watched the fight with curiosity and admiration. "Nanami, we should leave." Harada lifted me up and Heisuke opened a door on our side. I saw that Kazama looked over for a minute and then got back to the fight. "I don't have time for you maggots." He delivered a strong enough blow to make Hijikata launch backwards out into the courtyard. He had some trouble getting back up and Kazama turned towards us. "I can't let a filthy human like you touch what's mine." He moved so quickly that I didn't see him, but luckily Heisuke did and blocked him with his katana. "Don't you dare!" He glared into Kazama's eyes.

Kazama began to smile shortly and backed off. "I see, you have yet to figure out." With that said he turned his back towards us and walked away. "I will return for you, Nanami Hana." As a blue light engulfed him he disappeared. Looking at the scenery around me I was shocked. The fight had been so intense that most of the room had been destroyed. Harada was still holding me up and watched Hijikate run back into the room. Heisuke had gone to Shinpachi who was slowly waking up. "What just happened.." Shinpachi was rubbing his head as he tried to stand up. Heisuke helped him only to be shoved of a bit later. "Where did that bastard go!" Shinpachi saw the room and died down.

{Later that night.}

Everyone had gathered in the same room as the fight took place. "It seems they were only after him." Kondou explained. "When the person who claimed to be Chikage Kazama disappeared the others left as well." I was glad that no one was killed and a bit surprised to what had happened. How did that man know my name and why would he want to take me? As questions build up Shinpachi began to talk. "I mean maybe he just rolls that why, you know maybe he's into men." Okita joined in and nodded. "I agree, I mean he looks kind of cute, doesn't he." Blushing at his compliment I looked away. "Whaat, are you into him as well?" Harada joined as he clapped his hands on Shinpachi's shoulder. When he claimed it Shinpachi said nothing and only watched me closely. "Shinpachi are you serious?" Harada backed away for a moment and looked shocked. I wasn't sure if I should look away from Shinpachi or not. "Nah, I think I leave it at that." Shinpachi stated.

Hijikata cleared his troth and began to speak. "Good, now why would someone as powerful like him go after a weakling as you?" Somehow his words hurt me, but I only glared at him in disagree. "What are you hiding?" Hijikata's eyes narrowed and I didn't know where to look. "I'm.." I paused but then continued. "I am not hiding a thing, I told you that I was looking for Misukatse Hanabi, that is all!" I was desperate to let them believe me and my voice came out a little louder than I wanted. "I believe him." Heisuke was the one speaking and looking at Hijikata with strong eyes. "I understand the confusion, but I think we can trust him as well." Harada added and patted Heisuke on his head.

"Fine. Then tell me, do you know that man?" Hijikata stated and waited for my answer. I slowly shook my head and lowered my eyes. I didn't know him, but he knew me. I was confused and a bit afraid, he did tell me that he would return and I wasn't sure when. "I don't know him, but he seemed to know me." I said letting all the eyes rest on me again. "And I.." I hesitated for a moment, maybe it wasn't necessary, but I wanted them to know I was not a man. I felt a bit offended every time they did say 'him' Or 'he' Was I this manly? As everyone waited I gathered up my confidence and spoke out loud. "You said to me that a man should accept his death gracefully, right?" Harada looked a bit surprised and lifted his eye brows. "Yes I did."

"What about a woman? Should she do the same?" The question hit like a bomb and everyone was looking shocked and confused. "Meaning.." I hope they got the hint, but it seemed that somehow they just thought I was some guy wanting to know what they thought of woman I battle. "Woman shouldn't be in battle and it's a man's job to keep her safe. If he fails death is only a small punishment." Shinpachi added. I let my hand fall and took a deep breath. My stomach was feeling light and I looked back up. "I mean that I am not a man.." Looking especially at Hijikata I saw multiple faces turn in shock, but a few of them were just normally watching as I claimed to be a woman.

"No wonder I felt so attracted to you." Shinpachi began to release his breath. "Thank god you are, I was beginning to think I might becoming crazy." Shinpachi laughed at his remark and Harada smiled. "Well, your chest area did feel a little wired."

"Excuse me!" I turned red by his words. Did he, no maybe it was on accident when he helped me up. "Oh, Well your name sounded girly I should have figured." Okita smirked when he saw me blush. "Well, I wasn't going to keep it a secret, but it's easier to travel this way." I explained to them, but I don't think they really paid much attention. "This is going to form a problem." Hijikata spoke and lowered his eyes. "For the time being I would want you to stay in your room until we have come to a conclusion." I remember the last time he said that and I slowly nodded.

"Remember this is a residence filled with men, don't try to leave your room under any circumstance, got it." He looked fierce and I agreed quickly. What was I going to do about the situation, maybe I should have kept it a secret for some time. Heisuke was the one bringing me back to the room. "Wow I never would have thought you turned out to be a girl." He held his hands behind his head slowly speaking. "Hana.." I heard his name under his breath and I answered. "Yes?" Heisuke stopped and looked shocked. "Ah, I'm sorry. What was I saying again.." He looked a little flustered and confused, but laughed it off. "Your room is here, there will always be someone close by so if you need anything, just call." He smiled and led me in the room. "Also.." He grabbed my bonded hands and freed me. "Don't let any strange guys in, okay." With that he walked of, closing the door.

I guess I was a prisoner now, one they weren't sure of and that they rather not have at all. They weren't going to kill me yet, since I was looking for a person they obviously knew as well. I was confused by everything. At first I was just going to look for my mother's friend, or so I thought, but this ended up differently. I laid down on the futon and closed my eyes. It had been a long day and I was exhausted.

_"__Before long I will get you, Nanami Hana.." _A voice I found familiar sounded like it was right in my left ear. After that I fell asleep completely and didn't bother with the scenery around me, I just wanted to forget it all.


	5. The Water Of Life

***…Water Of Life…***

{June 1887, sunrise.}

It had been two full weeks since I got to the shinsengumi headquarters, I was never able to leave the room and when I did it was to go together with either Heisuke or Harada to go wash myself. It felt lonely and I wasn't going anywhere with my search as well. I needed to find that man to know what had happened to mother and possible get the potion he was talking about.

"Good morning, Nanami." Heisuke stormed in the room and looked rather happy. "I have good news, but.. I can't tell you yet, come with me." He dragged me off to the room I was brought to a few weeks back. "I see you're finally awake." Okita sat next to the door looking up with one eye closed. "I tried to wake you, but it seemed you wouldn't wake up no matter where I touched." He gave a mischievous smile and I turned deep red. Heisuke shot a big glare at Okita and he laughed it off. "No worries I was only kidding." Somehow his joke didn't make me laugh. I sat down with Heisuke next to me. Only Okita, Heisuke, Harada and Hijikata were in the room accompanying Kondou. "Alright, Nanami, since you were rather patience and didn't try to leave or object to our agreement I have approved of you." It shock none of the guys and only me. It made me happy as well. "I know you are trying to find Misukatse Hanami and we will assist in that matter, but we have a few question for him as well." Kondou looked worried for a second and then looked a Hijikata. "Since Hijikata is the man in charge around the guys I will leave you in his care. Whatever you might want to ask you should go to him." As Kondou started to leave Hijikata began to look annoyed. "Why do I get stuck with her." He muffled under his breath, but everyone could still hear it clearly, including me. "Ah, Hijikata I believe you were the one bringing her back here, so it's your responsibility." Okita spoke and followed Kondou. I could see he didn't want me to get even one step near him, but what was I supposed to do.

"Fine." He gave up and looked towards me. "From now on you can walk around." A soft clearing of a troth came from the doorway. "I need to add something." It was Sannan, the man with the glasses and limb arm. "She should stay in her male form." He paused and looked at me. "Since you are the only woman you could bring the moral of the other members down."

I understood the reason and I wasn't unfamiliar with acting like a man so I agreed. "Good then from now on you can trust us."

{July 1887, late afternoon.}

I've been sweeping the courtyard, making diner and cleaning parts of the building ever since I came here. I wasn't allowed to leave the compound without at least two members of the shinsengumi following me.

"Hey, Hana You doing a fine job I see." It was Harada who said it he was wearing his blue coat over his normal outfit. It meant that they were ready for patrol. "Don't overdo it, I mean you always work so hard and all." This time it was Heisuke. He and Harada walked with a few other men from the shinsengumi to leave for their regular patrol. "Don't worry I won't." I gave them a smile to let them know not to worry, it's the least I could do. I stayed in their care for over a month now and I wasn't much of use otherwise. "We'll be leaving now." Harada said and walked off. "Don't worry Hana, I think you will get to leave sooner or later, take care!" Heisuke followed Harada leaving me standing with a broom in my hand. Most of the men had left for their patrol and the residence looked kind of empty.

Walking around the compound I wasn't sure of what to do. As the night approached the sun had light the sky into a blood red mass. It was calming to know that everything looked so normal for a chance. The time I've spent here had made me feel safe. Walking passed a once silent room I felt the need to stop. The scene around me was quiet, but there was a low sound coming from this room. A low crumble and a few big sighs. I slowly placed my hand on the door sliding it open just enough for me to look inside.

"Sannan?" I saw the familiar figure of Sannan the man everyone looked at for his smarts. I opened the door a little more to see what he was doing. On a small table he was mixing something inside a small bottle. It looked as red as the sky now and it felt wrong to see him do this. "Nanami, you can come in now." A little shocked I walked inside closing the door behind me. He knew I was standing there even though I was trying to stay hidden. "This is a good opportunity to test my work." His face looked a bit twisted as if he had enough of his life. "Excuse me, Sannan.." As he heard my voice he turned back for a moment, smiling his usual fake smile. "As you already knew my arm is useless." He looked away for a moment letting the moment sink in. his eyes weren't like usual, but more darker and ready to give up. "Sannan?" He stood up. The small bottle filled with red liquid in his hands. "I got hit by that man and never recovered, but I used his research for my own benefits, you see.." He held the bottle up and looked at me intently.

"The man you're looking for is the same man that created the water of life. A substance that could cure any open wound, but I altered it." His voice was soft, but it hit like a rock. I knew a little about the water of life, but for him to have studied it and altered it. I couldn't think of what he wanted to do. "It was unstable, to say the least. I used his work to make it stronger and even better." He looked at his arm and smiled. "The water of life, would normally turn you into a monster, I think you know what I mean." Thinking back at the time I first met them I shuddered. Does that mean the thing he was holding could turn anyone into a monster. I couldn't find the strength to speak up, watching Sannan explain the whole thing to me.

"Without my arm I'm useless, I can't fight anymore." Was he going to drink that. "What do you mean, you aren't useless at all, Sannan." He smiled, this time sincerely and honest. "No, this is the only way now." He opened the bottle and brought it to his lips. "Stop it!" I took ahold of his arm, but he already took the liquid and swallowed it. Now looking at the man I thought was honest and proud I watched him sink to the ground his hand slowly twitching and beginning to move. "Sannan.." I backed up to feel a cold wind pass my body, directed at Sannan. He was now slowly turning into something else, his hair began to shift to the familiar white I encountered before and I stepped back.

"Uarg!" He screamed it sounded so painful and horrifying that I couldn't move. He quickly looked up his eyes shifting from red to his usual color. "San.." He finally stopped moving. His back moving up and down slowly as he breathed. "Hehe.." He was laughing, why what was so funny that it needed to be laughed at? He then moved to quickly to see and grabbed my arm holding me in place. His grip was strong and I could feel my skin scream for release. "Sannan, you're hurting me." I spoke, but he smiled almost like a demon. "Blood, I want blood.." He said and it brought me back to back then. The same words repeated and no feelings but bloodlust in its eyes. He grabbed his katana with the hand he hadn't been able to use for a while. The blade slit out of its hilt and pointed at me. "Sannan!"

I could feel his bloodlust rise, but I couldn't believe he would be like this. I was certain that he was in there somewhere, I couldn't think of him gone. "Auh." I gave a small pain away as he slit his katana against my cheek, the wound didn't stay long and Sannan noticed it disappear. "Why..?" He looked utterly confused and almost himself again. But he returned soon after reaching for my blood stained cheek. I closed my eyes and felt his cold hand slide across the blood. "This feeling.." He spouted. As I opened my eyes I could see him licking my blood from his fingers. My eyes grew wide and I wanted to disappear.

"Your blood is different.." Why is he saying this like he had tasted blood before. I don't like this, I want to leave. As I backed up he quickly looked over to me, reaching his hand out and grabbing his katana. I ducked and covered my head, but when I felt nothing I looked up. Before me stood a man one with a huge presence and one I couldn't forget. His golden hair swaying and blocking Sannan's katana with ease. "Kazama?" I stated his name. His ruby eyes looking back at me. "Don't get in my way." Kazama said and pushed Sannan away with his sword. "What do you think you will accomplish with your actions." He looked back at Sannan almost as if he was angry, but I could see his eyes relax and turn to annoyance. Sannan however wanted nothing than to kill Kazama his eyes were full of bloodlust and he almost looked like he enjoyed it. "What is going on here!" With the noise we made I knew someone would have heard us and while thinking, Hijikata entered the room. Seeing Kazama and Sannan standing both in the same room he firstly didn't notice me, but once he did his eyes grew colder. "Sannan, what's the meaning of this!" Hijikate stepped forward "You pathetic humans, trying to create something that you can't control, I should just wipe you off the earth." Kazama looked at Sannan who was slowly turning back to normal. "Uh, what happened.." Looking confused Sannan fell to the ground, I could hear a click of Kazama's tongue before he disappeared into nothing. Hijikata walked over and kneeled beside me. "Are you alright, tell me what happened.


	6. Festival Of Flowers

***…Festival of Flowers…***

{August 1887, morning.}

Ever since Sannan attacked me he had been locked inside his room. Sometimes he screamed making me feel sick to my stomach, I was told to not talk about what happened to anyone other than the shinsengumi heads. I wasn't going to be killed like they told me when I first arrived and it made me feel like I belonged here.

I sighed. "What is it Hana?" Heisuke responded to my sigh and watched me closely. "I know it's hot and all, but you shouldn't let your breath go to waste." Heisuke was the one always close to me, he was nice and calming to be around, almost like a brother. "No, I was just thinking about something." Heisuke smiled and leaned backwards. He always looks so relaxed and even though he wasn't much older than me he reminded me of a child sometimes. "You know with Hijikata's approval we could take you outside headquarters, maybe you will find a clue on the person we're looking for." Heisuke smiled kindly and stood up. "For now just stay here and don't move. I'll be right back!" As he began to ran in the direction of hijikata's room I noticed how fast he was. His movements like a deer running in a forest, never stopping or missing a beat.

{Afternoon.}

Harada and Heisuke were told to watch me as I followed them on their patrol. It was a normal issue for them, but it made me happy to do something other than cleaning and I smiled. "You should keep smiling like that." Harada said sinking to my level, his face was close and I could see my reflection in his eyes. "Yeah, it makes you look real pretty!" I blushed as I heard Heisuke say that and the few men that were with us looked back. "Just keep going." Harada said fiercely and the soldiers moved on. "Heisuke, don't say it to loudly, what if they find out." His voice was in a whisper, but I could hear that he was a little annoyed. "Don't worry, I doubt they suspect anything." I smiled as I saw them converse over something like that. I have been their guest for a long time now and I never felt like I was unwanted, not after they claimed to protect me.

"Excuse me, but I can't help but wonder?" I said in a quiet, but stern voice. Both Harada and Heisuke looked simultaneously back at me. "Why aren't you wearing your coat?" I couldn't help notice, since we were on patrol they always wore them. Harada smiled and took my hand in his getting a quick look from Heisuke. "We aren't going any further, let's have some fun!"

Getting dragged away by Harada and being followed closely by Heisuke I wondered where the three of us were going. Soon enough a scenery of light and people filled my view. As everything came closer I could hear the people laugh, having fun and conversing. The street was filled with lanterns and stalls filled with food, people were swarming like wasps around them and that's when I noticed the flower field in the middle of all of it. "Wow it's so beautiful!" I watched the tower of flowers in all kinds of colors stretch its way up to the sky. The sky was turning red and everything looked so welcoming. "Isn't it, this is called the festival of flowers, it's a thanks to the gods for the great summer season." Harada explained and watched the food stalls on or right. "They have all kinds of different activity and lots of food!" Harada seems to like food a lot, since as soon as he spotted something to eat his eyes began to glow. "But first…" Both of them looked my way and smiled devilish. "Let's get you ready!"

A moment later I was inside a room together with a young girl my age, she introduced herself as Sen and the woman next to her addressed her as princess. "My my, why would a beautiful girl like yourself dress like a man?" He voice was childish, but her words were only mature sounding. A noble woman that wore a beautiful red kimono with her hair tied on each side of her head. A small yet elegant looking hairpin held her hair in place. "Uhm, I don't have a choice." Sen looked a bit shocked, but soon returned to her smiling self and held out a blue kimono. "I think this will look wonderful." She waited until I accepted and chanced my outfit. With a little help of Sen I got into the kimono and looked at myself in the mirror. "You look wonderful, Hana." I could hardly recognize myself, my body was tied in this beautiful kimono that even when I was still dressed as a girl never wore. It was heavier than the male clothing I always wore, but it felt somewhat familiar. The woman beside Sen had done my hair. Long locks of brown curls were hanging around my slender face. My brown eyes were lighted with some light make-up and they were shining as I watched myself carefully.

"Wow, I can hardly see myself in the mirror, thank you!" I felt happy that I could wear some woman clothing again, it isn't bad wearing male clothing, but I just wanted to feel like a woman again for a change. "No, thank me by being my friend, you are always welcome to return." Sen's smile brightened the mood even more and I nod in agreement. It was the first time a woman was aware of my true identity and I was happy. I wouldn't be alone anymore even though I had the shinsengumi they were different and hard to talk to sometimes so having a woman as a friend would be a great thing.

I slowly stepped outside, still a bit unfamiliar with the slippers. They were higher than normal and it felt as if I walked of air. Seeing the surprised faces of two familiar figures I snapped out from my thoughts. "Sorry I took so long." I apologized and Harada began to smile. "No, if I having to wait long means that you would become even more beautiful I will wait forever." His words made me blush and look away. My eyes met Heisuke who was still gazing my way a little flustered. "Come on Heisuke, tell her she's beautiful." Harada pulled Heisuke closer with a gentle push. "Uh.." He was looking for words, I could see his face redden and then when he finally found the words his face clued on my vision.

"Hana, you look really pretty." Harada smiled as if he was the one getting the compliment and I did the same. "Thank you." I did my best to hide the fluttering feeling inside my stomach as I watched Heisuke stumble on his words and giving me a halfhearted smile. He looked so embarrassed and I couldn't help but laugh at it. "We wanted you to smile more, it's been almost four months already and you almost never left the compound. This is our free time as well, so let's have some." Harada led the way around the different kinds of food they had stalled. It all smelled delicious and the air around the festival felt warm and welcoming. "Heisuke, what's wrong?" Heisuke had been down for some time now and didn't seem to have that much fun at all. "It's nothing.." He said almost without an emotion. I could clearly see something was up, but what could it be? "Are you sure, maybe you're sick." I touched his forehead to match mine. His temperature seems fine. "You don't seem to be sick, but you're turning red." Heisuke turned to look at the ground beneath us and mumbled something softly, so I couldn't understand. "Heisuke maybe you should leave, let's go Hana." Getting my hand Harada pretended to walk away. "No! I can't let you take her, you womanizer!" Harada let go of my hand and held it above his head. "Well that is just rude." Heisuke grabbed his vest and looked at him through tiny eyes. "You always have a woman call for you when we are outside. No matter where we are it's always buzzy around you." Somehow I couldn't see Harada surrounded by woman, but it did make me laugh. "Heisuke, you shouldn't talk about things you have no understanding of." Heisuke pushed him away and looked my way. "Don't be fooled Hana, he seems all mature and nice, but I bet he's a womanizer." The day went on normally and we were on our way back to the shinsengumi headquarters. "It's too bad you had to change back, Hana." Harada sighed and stretched his arms. "Yes, but I already agreed to be dressed as a man when I'm inside the compound." I felt a bit disappointed that I couldn't dress in nice womanly clothing anymore, but I was happy I at least had a place to stay. "I bet Heisuke wanted to look at you some more…" Harada began, but once he spoke his face turned serious and he stopped walking. That moment three men all looking rather intimidating stood in front of us. "Kazama.." Heisuke spoke beneath his breath and I stepped back a little.

"I can't say I'm pleased to see you either." The man with shining blonde hair and deep blood red eyes stood together with two unknown men before us. One of the man had long curly black hair and a tattoo on his left shoulder. His face looked mature, but I could see hint of a child in them. He was way taller than Kazama and I thought that he was the tallest man I had ever seen. He didn't look all that interested just as the red haired man who looked like a strong figure, Physically and mentally. He has a small evenly red beard that looked rather fitting of his image. "So this is the woman you're interested in.." The man with long black hair stepped forward and looked closer. "Where is your lovely maidens outfit you had on earlier. It's way better than this one." He smiled reaching for my hem. "Stop right there." Harada held out his spear towards the stranger who stopped in his track almost as if he knew it would happen. "Why are you here." Heisuke said more demanding than asking. Kazama closed his eyes for a second. "I'm here to take what's mine."


	7. A Strong Emotion

***…A Strong Emotion…***

{August 1887, Night time.}

The stars had been covered by the clouds and a heavy wind began to rise. "What the hell." Heisuke's voice shouted out loud in the quiet night and it made me jump. "Who the heck do you think you are!" He sounds angry I can even see him shake a little. Kazama's eyes turned towards me and I stepped back. Just a moment later Harada jumped in front of me as if to protect me from the danger. "You have one interesting hobby.." Harada spoke getting the black haired man's attention. "You brat!" His thin lips spread and his narrow eyes spouted fire. As if they could read each other's mind they began to fight.

First it was only Harada slashing his way towards him, but once he knew that the man was too fast for him he stopped. "You're fast." Harada didn't seem to get him as the enemy, he spoke as if to a familiar. "I can't say you're that bad either." The man smiled, then the real battle began as the black haired man pulled out a pistol and pointed it at Harada. He didn't seem all that surprised and Harada went in for the attacked. A loud noise filled the night and I watched Harada quickly dodge the bullet that had been fired. He launched back at the man and his spear sharp enough to penetrate a wooden barn went full speed forward. They didn't reach each other and it became a game of dodge.

In the meantime, Heisuke had planted himself before me. "I came here to take you with me, Hana." Kazama's soft but eerie voice filled my head. I didn't want to go anywhere with a man like that. Even though I didn't know him I could feel like he was someone dangerous and powerful. "You're not taking her!" Heisuke claimed and stepped forward, but before he reached Kazama the red haired man claimed the spot. "Drop your weapon and retreat." He said commanding. Heisuke felt the strong killing intent, but just clicked his tongue. "No way, bastard." The moment he said that the man with red hair punched a great deal of strength in Heisuke's body. He launched backwards hitting the ground hard enough for me to hear.

"Heisuke!" I screamed, scared that he might have been injured severely. I was ready to run towards him, but a strong pair of hands pulled me to a stop. "Don't hinder yourself with broken creatures like that." Looking back I watched Kazama look down on me. I was scared, but tried to hide it with a glare pointing it at his direction. "Stop, let me go!" I shouted and tried to get free, but he just tightened his grip and his eyes narrowed. "Why would you care what happens to them." Somehow the question shocked me. What does he mean by that. He's been calling them names that seemed like he is an entire different race. "Why, because they are my friends."

Heisuke wasn't getting up and Harada had a hard time fighting off the man shouting bullets at him. "Why are you doing this?" My voice was soft and I felt the power leave my body. Kazama looked as if he had already won and stared into my eyes. It felt as if he could look right into my being and it made me shiver. His presence had already been bigger than most, but now I'm this close to him I could feel the immense pressure against my own. "You still haven't figured it out." Kazama took out a small knife and brought it in a swift motion towards my arm. He slit it across my upper wrist and blood came flowing out. "Auh.." I flinched at the small shot of pain coming from the cut, but as soon as it appeared it closed and I watched the still warm blood drip down my arm.

"See you are one of the few remaining purebloods." He lifted my arm to his face and looked at me with eyes of an animal. His lips touched the place he had cut me and he slit his tongue over the still fresh blood. My skin tickled and I shivered from his touch. I was surprised on how much I didn't mind his touch. I did not have any experience with men, but I was sure I wouldn't want to do anything with a man I hardly knew. "Your blood is alluring and screaming for attention."

"No!" I pulled my hand back, but didn't get far, since Kazama still held mine. His hand was strong and pulled me back into his chest. "Female demons are rare" He lifted me up and carried me like a man would do with his bride. He held on strongly and I knew that I didn't have a change even if I tried to struggle. "Let her go!" A strong and familiar voice echoed through the still going on fight. At first I looked back at Heisuke, but he was still passed out and not moving and inch. "Bastard what do you think you're doing!" Looking back at the familiar raven black hair that swayed in the wind. A strong slash cutting of a small piece of Kazama's blonde hair.

With calm eyes Kazama watched his attacker. A boy evenly high as Heisuke and maybe even of the same age stood before us. I didn't know him directly, but as soon as I saw his amazing brown eyes it came to me. "Ibuki!" Full of surprise I watched Ibuki, my friend from long ago, stand his ground against a man as powerful as Kazama. He looked with eyes full of rage and confusion. Why is he here and why did he get himself involved in all this?

"Who are you." Kazama asked the question getting the attention of everyone around him. The fighting had stopped for a second and they both faced our way. "Why ask a name when you don't have one yourself." Somehow I had the feeling this was said before. Kazama's eyes flinched and I saw him getting the same thought as I did. "Kazama Chikage." He answered calmly, pretending he wasn't annoyed by the statement. "My name is Ibuki Ryunosuke, now let her go!" His voice went from casual to angry and he pointed his katana back at Kazama's face. For a moment I thought I saw Kazama smile, but it disappeared to quickly for me to capture it completely. "Another interesting character has shown himself." Kazama slowly put me back on the ground and I stepped away from him. Ibuki stepped in front of me and shielded me from Kazama's sight. "Do you like kidnapping girls this much." Ibuki glanced towards the unconscious body of Heisuke and then back at Kazama. "Do you plan to fight me." Kazama's low and eerie voice cut the silence. Ibuki snapped and launched at Kazama who swiftly dodged the attack. He didn't even pull his katana out and only leaped his way backwards avoiding Ibuki's sword. "Stop moving!"

Ibuki seemed to get the fact he wasn't going to hit Kazama anytime soon and stopped. Even Harada and the man with the black hair stopped to watch. "We're leaving." Kazama said casually and walked away. The two men following. "See you later." The man said to Harada and they all disappeared before our eyes. We all looked shocked, everyone a little relieved they had stopped their fighting and left, even though it hurt a bit. We all let out a sigh, yet somehow I couldn't get the words out of my mind.

_"__See you are one of the few remaining pureblood..." _His voice low and piercing my mind._ "Female demons are rare.." _I couldn't stop the throbbing pain in my heart as I felt powerless. How could I be a demon and a pureblood? My mother is a normal woman that works herself to hard just for her only daughter. Thinking back at my mother I feel the need to flee. "Hana, are you alright?" Hearing the warm voice of Ibuki I look back. "I'm a demon.." Still I couldn't believe his word. I had no power no strength and nothing to make me think I was a demon, apart from my fast healing. Ibuki saw my troubled face and embraced my still shaking body. "It's alright, I came to find you." His voice brought back memories of him, when I was still back home. Ibuki was a farmer's son who always looked out for me. He walked me to the small school we had and even teaches me how to wield a sword. He wasn't a master at it, but we always had fun playing. That was until mother fell ill and I set out on this adventure. I missed him even though I tried not to think about home to much. I pushed myself away from Ibuki and dried my eyes. "How is mother doing?" He looked away for a second and then back at me. "She is still sleeping, but the townspeople are taking good care of her, she looks just as healthy as she did when she was awake." Ibuki's words made me feel better even thought there was still no change. She hadn't woken up or made any movement for over five months. It made me worry, yet she was save and everyone at the village took good care of her. "That's great."

"Care to tell me what is going on?" The tall figure of Harada faced over Ibuki who got pulled back from me and stared down on by him. "Harada, this is Ibuki, a friend from my village. Ibuki, this is Harada he takes care of me." The both of them stare at each other and then nod as if they approve of the situation. Remembering Heisuke I widen my eyes. "Heisuke!" Dashing towards Heisuke I see him slowly breathing. At least he is still alive. Harada follows and lifts Heisuke over his shoulder. "I don't know if our demon commander approves, but since this kid here saved your life he may come with us." Harada spoke before leading the way. The rode towards the shinsengumi's headquarter took a lot longer than usual. The silence filled the already tense cloud around us and made the dark ever so creepy.

I still couldn't believe the words Kazama had spoken, but I also couldn't forget them. He was always so mysterious and disappearing and appearing whenever he saw fit. I couldn't understand his mind and it made me feel powerless. I was also happy, I had newly gained information about my mother and Ibuki fond me.


	8. Quick Update

***…Quick Update…***

Hello there,

So I completed the first six episodes of Aku No Hana!  
I'm so glad I got this finished.  
Not that I don't like writing it, but it gets harder every time.  
I did introduce all the character I wanted and who are important.  
As of now the story will progress more in the character development, meaning I will spend more time on the important characters.

{Furthermore.}

This story is about Hana Nanami, even though she might have a lot in common with Chizuru Yukimura, I assure you that i plan on getting into that more. She will have her own mind later on and will get stronger by time, but I just wanted to get the main character out of the way first.

And I didn't explain fully how she looks since I don't do well with describing her size, just think of her as a main protagonist of a real visual novel/Otome game. (Brown hair/Brown eyes. Plain in Japan-World!)

And I want to apologize for the spelling mistakes, I red threw my work and well what I found was something quit embarrassing… Anyways just don't read too much into the mistakes, I plan to read threw my work at least twice before I upload.

Just a thank you for the reader, I am really thankful and proud that my work did so well with you guys. I might not be a professional, but I plan on working my way up and it will take time. Because you read my story I will get to see that dream come true even sooner.

This is the first story I'm really working on, I have two others I rather just get rid of, but since a few people like it I won't and I will get it finished. I think I'm getting you too much information and I wouldn't care either if I was the one reading this so...

Thank you again for reading and don't forget to review and say what you think, it helps a lot!

Have fun reading! \\(^.^)/


	9. Memories Of Home

***…Memories of Home…***

{December 1885, Afternoon.}

I walked back from the school, bringing the few children with me. The school wasn't really anything that you could call a school, but more a place where the children would go to and learn how to read and write. It wasn't normal for pour villagers like us to have a school, but since my mother could write and read text, she would give lessons to both children and adults. "Bringing the kids back home are you." One of the farmers said out loud and I gave him a bright smile. "Of course, I wouldn't want them to walk home alone."

"It's great to have bright people like you in our village. It makes the day better." The old man went back to his work and I walked on. "Hana, are you also going to get married?" A young boy asks suddenly, his name is Shin and he is the son of the doctor. "Maybe someday, I will." The boy began to pout and stopped walking. "You can't marry yet, I have to grow up and then you will marry me!" He takes my hand and keeps on walking. The two younger girls are already walking up front. Shin is one of the few boys that have been born in this village. It may be located in Edo, but it's far from it. Times here had been bad before, people dying of a strange illness that mostly got the males. After a few years almost no boys were born and people were starting to get suspicious. Of course I thought it was just a coincidence, but everyone was scared. My mother is a strong woman that moved here before I was even born, sometimes I see people looking at her as if she was some kind of stranger, but I know it's probably because she wasn't born in this village.

"Hana, thank you for taking Shin home, I hope he wasn't causing you any trouble." I smile at the doctor. "No not at all, I will get him in the morning." My mother works as a teacher, this town couldn't read or write and with my mother's knowledge she wanted it to be passed on. Now almost everyone in this village can write and read, what makes me proud. Dropping of the last two girl I make my way back to my house. The village is small, but the houses are placed far from each other. The people have a lot of land stuck to their homes where they make money off. It's nice to walk around, even when the temperature dropped to below zero. There was no snow yet and all the trees were without leaves and it was cold.

"Should a young girl, like yourself, be walking alone?" I turned towards the familiar voice. "Should a young man, like you, state something like that?" It was Ibuki, a famers son. He was a year older that I was, but a head taller. "Why are you here Ibuki?" He pushed himself from the tree he was leaning on and scratched his head. "I came to walk you home, I've heard about someone suspicious lurking around lately." I gave a try at holding my laughter, but some sounds escaped. "Are you worried about me?" Ibuki clicks his tongue and crosses his arms. "Of course I am." The both of us begin to make our way home. Ibuki lives with his father on a farmhouse not far from mine. His father looks scary and is feared by most people here. They don't know him like I do. When I was still a child, together with Ibuki, a stranger tried to practice his swords skills on us. When Ibuki's father saw what was going on he fought the stranger of and even cried before us. He was so glad he could save us, but he told us to never talk about it to anyone. It was too scary of an experience to tell anyone and we kept quiet. His father may look scary with his fierce eyes, muscular body and spiky hair, but he is just like any other father trying to do the best for his child who lost his mother at birth.

"Do you think it will begin to snow soon?" I look at the sky, it wasn't normal blue like it had been this morning. There were grey clouds forming that turned darker by the second. "I guess, it may even storm." Storms weren't frequent here and when it did most of the people came together for shelter in the storehouse. It was the only building made out of stone. "We should go towards the storehouse." Even though my thoughts were thinking of my mother, who was still in the small school building we made a little further back. "Aren't you thinking about your mother right now, we can go back." Ibuki knew my worry and stopped walking. "We should at least try to look for her." I could feel the worry build in my stomach and I looked from side to side to make it disappear. "..Alright." I finally said and turned around. It wasn't often that I disobeyed my mother, but I couldn't just leave her in a storm and she would have done the same for me. With Ibuki following next to me we sped up the pace we walked. Almost running towards the small building at the end of the road.

"Mom!" I burst open the wooden door to see nothing but empty tables and papers lying around. "She must have gone to the storehouse already." Ibuki stated. The wind had begun to slam against the woodwork and made the eerie feeling in my stomach turn worse. "What should we do, we can't go back without knowing where she is!" I was a bit panicked and looked around for a clue she may have left behind. Mother was always prepared for anything and even though she had a lot on her mind she always smiled.

"We should stay here. The snow is already coming down." Ibuki looked out of the window and closed the wooden racks as soon as the snow came flying in. Cold wind stroke my bare face and I could feel myself shiver. "I'm sorry." I said quietly. I knew it was my fault that we ended up here. If I just trusted my mother more we could have been save inside the storehouse by now. My stomach turned to the idea of Ibuki being in danger. Everything that would happen from now on would be on me. "Hana, stop whining, I was the one that told us to go back." Ibuki picked up a blanket from the ground and began to make a small shelter. "Care to help me, it will get cold and I don't know for how long this storm will last." Moving myself to get all kinds of blankets and rags that are used for the kids in school. I was glad we had so many of them even though we only had a few children attending.

"We should…" Ibuki stopped midsentence and looked a bit flustered. "We should stay close inside the blankets.." It was a bit embarrassing to hear him stutter the words, but I could understand. Even though he was my friend he was still a man and I a woman. He knew that it might lead to someone thinking strange of the situation as soon as someone found us.

"Ye.. Yes you're right." I walked over a bit conscious about the situation. Maybe if he said it in his normal voice I wouldn't be thinking like this. Ibuki always has a way to make things awkward. It is something that makes him who he is. I like how he tries to get everyone to feel better even though he will only make it worse. The cold wind finally got me and I felt the need to jump into the blankets. Waiting for Ibuki to do the same I patted the seat next to me. "We should keep warm if you get sick it would be bad right." Ibuki finally gave in and seated himself a little off of me. There was enough room between us to fit another person. "Ibuki, don't worry so much." It felt as if some distance came between us even though we had been friends for years.

"I can't stay to close to you, what if I do something strange." The words got me of guard and my head turned towards him. "What do you mean?" Even though he was looking to the side I could feel him being embarrassed. "Ibuki, you will not do anything strange, come closer or we will freeze to death." I hop closer and pull the blankets around us bringing our bodies closer. "I was thinking about that time in the forest, when that strange man tried to hunt us down. Your father came and chased him away. That was the first time I saw him cry and it made me happy." Ibuki looked down on me and smiled. "I know, my father looks so scary yet he has such a kind heart." We began to talk about our pasts the times we recalled were all kind moments we shared. Memories we held dear and times we couldn't forget.

"I think the storm passed.." I felt Ibuki's head touch my shoulder. He must have been tired from being awake all night long. His shoulders were slowly moving up and down from breathing and I smiled. He is always trying so hard, trying to be the strongest, but in fact he is just like his father.

{ April 1887, Morning.}

The morning sun filled the sky with a red glow. The morning birds are singing their songs and people are waking. "Are you really leaving?" The voice of the one I didn't want to leave behind sounds from behind me as I stop in my track. "I have no choice I need to find him." My voice sounded strong, yet inside I felt as if any moment now I could fall apart. "You look like a man, but you're still a woman." Strong arms embrace me from behind and my hands move to grab them. "I will return, someday." The feeling of sadness grows and I turn as I pull myself from the raven haired man looking down towards the ground. "Hana, don't go."

"Ibuki, don't look so sad, it's not like I'll be gone forever." Ibuki puts on a fake smile and stands proud. "Fine, I'll wait for a while I will be with your mother to keep her safe, but I will go after you if it takes too long, got that!" I smile and nod. This time I won't be able to hide behind Ibuki or his father for protection, my mother will not be with me to scold me when I do something wrong. I'm on my own this time.


	10. Confessions In The Moonlight

***…Confessions in the moonlight…***

{August 1887, Late afternoon.}

It had been a week since Ibuki showed up and Heisuke got injured. I was still skeptical about being a demon and everything else that man called Kazama said. It felt as if he said it in a dream, yet I couldn't dismiss the fact that Heisuke still suffered that injury.

"Hana, we're going out, join us!" The green bandana of Shinpachi immediately got my eye. His cheerful face looked forced. Next to him stood Saito the man of few words and a samurai who wields his swords at his left side. "Where are you going?" I asked immediately, but I knew they were probably going somewhere to feel better. Heisuke had sustained a great injury from the fight. His ribs were broken and his body was full of bruises. The doctor wasn't sure if he would ever wake up or if he would even make it through the week, but luckily he did and everyone was cheering up a little. "We're going to dink of course, wanna join?" His face lighted up a bit, but the feeling of sadness still hang in the air. Even Saito felt different even though he tried to hide it. "I'm fine, go an enjoy yourselves." I watched them leave the compound and I went back to sweeping the ground.

I felt a pressure pass by as I turned and looked at the room Heisuke was sleeping in. This feeling of something inhuman, yet at the same time completely fine. There I spotted a man I hadn't seen in a long time, ever since that day he drank the water of life. "Sannan…" I spoke to myself in a whisper. It was so soft even I couldn't fully hear it, but as soon as the words left my lips, the man who was once part of the shinsengumi turned towards me. His lips curling into a smile and his usual piercing eyes stared right through me. He moved his once immobile arm and showed me the same red liquid he drank that day he turned into someone else. What was he trying to do?

I couldn't move, my feet were stuck at the ground and my eyes couldn't leave the scene. My heart was beating faster and I felt the memories flood back into my mind.

_"__Your blood is different…" Why is he speaking like he has tasted blood before? _

I could still feel his fingers sliding across my cheek as he licked my blood from them. He looked and acted differently and it scared me, if that man Kazama didn't appear, I would have been death by now. But that isn't important right now. What is he doing at Heisuke's room. I was a little worried for him, he did wake the night before, but he was still in a daze and didn't even recall what had happened.

"Hana! Why are you still sweeping, it's already turning dark." I snapped from my thoughts when I heard Ibuki's voice running towards me. He was sweating and had red cheeks. It looked cute, but also really manly. "Ibuki?" I was a bit surprised when he showed up, but I quickly composed myself and gave him a welcomed smile. "Yes, you're right. I should prepare dinner." Ibuki wiped his sweat and gave me a bright and reassuring smile. "I trained together with the shinsengumi." He looked so proud that it made my heart flutter. When he was younger he wanted to be strong so he could protect the people dear to him, just like his father. It was such a cute thing back then and he is probably still following that dream. "Really!" I became happy at the words he spoke. His whole being was giving of a warm feeling even when stopped smiling.

"Are you worried about him?" He asked that question and I didn't know how to answer. I was indeed worried for his safety yet I couldn't really place the feeling I had beyond that. It felt as if only being worried wasn't enough to describe it. I nodded slowly. It was probably my fault that he got injured. I was the one they wanted and he protected me. I recalled the events that took place. How Heisuke stood in front of me like a shield. If that red haired man didn't use that much strength he wouldn't be in this much pain. I felt a flash of guilt flood over my senses. "I do worry about him, Heisuke protected me from those people yet he got injured." Ibuki stretched his arm and placed it on top of my head. With a bright smile he ruffled my hair. "I was there to protect you as well, you know. I'm glad I followed you here."

"Thank you.." I recalled his interference at the attack and I didn't even get the chance to thank him back then. "..for protecting me as well." I grabbed the broom tighter as I felt another flood of feelings pass over me. This time it was the feeling of wanting to return home, to see my mother again and to be away from all the dangers we were facing right now.

{August 1887, Evening.}

Another day had passed and with the sighting of Sannan my worries grew. I was afraid that Heisuke would drink the same red fluid that Sannan drank and turn into someone else. "Do you like attention.." I turned to the voice and spotted Ibuki planted against the wall. He moved from it and walked towards me. I was sitting inside one of the empty rooms they used for serving food or bathing. The doors where open and I watched the water at the pond. Ibuki crouched down and sat beside me. "What do you mean?" Referring to his question earlier I looked a little confused. "You act all innocent, but you already have guys falling for you.." It felt a bit heavy on my shoulders as he said that. I looked at him from the corners of my eyes and saw him smile his sinister smile. "You are confusing me with someone else, I am a man you know." I said it to act brave and mostly on impulse. I knew I wasn't a man for real, but if someone would overhear us it would lead to wired misunderstandings. Okita began to laugh and I felt as if he was making fun of me. I never talked to him much, but maybe there was a reason. He always told jokes that weren't really a joke at all. His humor was way off and always made the party around him question everything about his figure.

"Hana.. Your name sounds so girly and your face is rather feminine. You can act and say you're a man, but you can't hide the fact that… you're cute." He said the last few words after a short pause. It almost felt as if I should take them in carefully. I turned red by his words and face away as bashfulness flooded over me. "Lately you turned even cuter, do you have someone on your mind?" A drip of water fell from the sky and hit the pond. Within a few seconds rain poured from the clouds that had gathered above the city of Kyoto. It didn't add much to the atmosphere Okita had created. It felt as if the sky was telling me to spill my feelings, but I wasn't ready yet, I wasn't sure of myself at all. "I don't think I like anyone more than a friend." I said full confidence, but I wasn't sure of what I said. "You think so huh." Okita placed a hand close to mine and touched my cheek with the other. "We can change that if you'd like to." His emerald green eyes were staring right into my dull everyday brown eyes and he let his hand move towards my ponytail. He undid it as if he knew no better. My curly brown hair fell down reaching just a little over my shoulders. My face turned into one of surprise as he entangled his hands with one of my curls. "What are you doing Okita." I spoke in a firm voice, yet he didn't seem to back down telling me it was a joke. I knew he had weird sense of humor, but this was going a bit too far. The rain had stopped already and the moon lit up the area. I felt a bit pressured and didn't know what to do. "You have something on your mind, haven't you?" Okita kept looking at me as if to read my thoughts. It's strange, but somehow I felt the need to tell my feelings.

"I'm sorry, I can't keep it any longer." I felt tears prick against the back of my eyes and my troth felt dry. I held a pause in my words and Okita looked surprised for a moment. "I feel like I am to blame." I began to tell him my feelings. The things I wanted to say to everyone, yet couldn't. Telling him about the fight and how Heisuke got injured, how I felt guilty and what I could do to help more. "I don't know what to do, I only bring you guys more work. I have to get stronger.."

"Then why are you crying." I looked back at Okita, shocked to the fact my eyes had begun to leak fluid without me knowing. Okita moved his hand from my hair and wiped away the tears that had ran down my face. "I.. why am I crying, it's ridicules I am not supposed to cry when I'm the one causing trouble." Okita laid his large hand on the back of my head and pulled me into his chest. "Idiot, no one thinks you're a bother. They all care about you even though our meeting was kind of.. interesting." He couldn't find the right word to describe our meeting. "We think of you as one of us now." His heart was pounding in his chest and made me feel less frightened, I calmed down due to his soft heartbeat. "So you should toughen up a bit." I felt happiness inside of me. The feeling of the sun rising in my heart. "Thank you Okita, I feel better now." Even though I don't really know everybody good enough yet, I feel like they are my important friends and I don't want them to face danger for me. That is why I decided to get stronger and learn about my demon strength. If I get stronger I can eventually protect what is important to me as well, just like Ibuki told me he would do.


	11. Heisuke's Choice

***…Heisuke's choice…***

{August 1887, Morning.}

Two weeks had passed since the battle with Kazama. Heisuke was slowly recovering and I took upon the job of bringing him food in the morning. I still felt guilty about the incident and wanted to apologize to him. It was the first time in two weeks I would see him again. Somehow it made me feel nervous. I walked over the wooden floor outside the many rooms of the shinsengumi headquarters. Most of the rooms were filled with men that had been practicing and came to rest. There were many rooms, yet most of the soldiers slept with at least five to nine people in one room.

"Can I enter?" I had lowered myself to the ground placing the hot miso soup I had prepared at my aside. I couldn't hear much sound coming from the room and predicted he was still asleep. I slowly opened the sliding door towards me and place the tray of food inside, before I entered myself. "Heisuke, I've brought you something to eat." I felt so nervous I couldn't tell what I was doing. It felt as if everything went on automatically. Maybe it was because I was still feeling guilty about what happened. As I thought Heisuke was lying with his arms spread out, his eyes were still closed and his chest wasn't covered with anything but bandages. At first I felt pain shoot through my heart. But I realized that he might get a cold if he laid there without a blanket. I walked over with the miso soup and placed it next to him. Lowering myself to the ground and sitting next to him as I looked at his banded chest. I wonder if it still hurts. I took ahold of the futon's cover and lifted it over his chest.

When I slowly placed it on his body his eyes flew open and he grabbed my arm pulling me under his weight. A bit panicked I held my breath. "Hana!" His face went from serious to shocked in a moment as he looked down on my panicked face. "I.. I'm sorry I woke you up." A little embarrassed at the situation I felt my cheeks turn red. Heisuke finally got to the point where he realized what was going on and turned red himself. "I.. I'm sorry.." He released my arm and moved of me leaving the spot he was sitting on a moment ago cold. "I had a dream." I composed myself and went back to sitting next to the futon. "I'm sorry Heisuke. If I wasn't here you wouldn't have gotten injured and.." Heisuke pointed his index finger at my forehead and poked it. It was a little surprising and I stopped talking. "Stupid, I did all that on my own." His words were sincere, a smile reassuring me that he was doing fine. "You don't have to feel guilty or anything." Heisuke finally noticed the soup and looked towards it as if he was a hungry puppy asking for permission. "I made it for you, please go ahead." Heisuke didn't even flinch and picked it up as he devoured the miso soup in seconds. "Wow, thank you so much. I had to eat the dinner made by Shinpachi for two weeks now. His taste for sweetness is really disgusting!" Heisuke made a face I couldn't describe and it made me laugh a bit. Heisuke's face calmed down and went to a soft and caring smile as if he felt relieved. "See, don't worry so much, just smile it's the best medicine." His words were kind and it felt as if I could keep going forever.

"He didn't do anything bad to you, did he?" His face went to a bit of worry when he asked. At first I was confused, but when I got what he was saying I felt the feeling of fear strike me once more. He was talking about that day when he was knocked out, he didn't get the whole picture and no one had told him anything as I could see. I shook my head. "N.. No, nothing happened." Even If I said that I still felt his lips on my skin as if he was just here. I didn't feel scared by his touch, but I also didn't want him to. The feeling that I got was something I had never experienced before. As if he was someone I knew yet had never seen before. "That's good." He looked relieved and I remembered the night Sannan showed up.

"Heisuke, why was Sannan here?" Heisuke's eyes flew wide open and he looked shocked. So he knew he showed up and something probably happened between them. "Did he say something to you?" I felt worried I was sure that whatever Sannan had to say would mean something bad. Heisuke had gone silent and I watched him move around nervously. "Did he talk to you about the water of life?" Heisuke stopped moving and looked at the ground. His silence was prove enough to me and I felt my stomach sink to the bottom. "He did! Please, Heisuke you don't have to." I felt desperation fill my whole being as I desperately tried to keep my cool. "You know what will happen when you drink it, right?" I was a bit panicked and blurred out all kinds of means for him not to drink it. "What if you turn into a monster and start killing, what do you do when…"

"Stop." His voice was firm. His face looked serious once more as he looked into my eyes. I felt as if I couldn't do anything but watch. "I won't tell you that I'm not thinking of it." The words began to fill my mind, why is he thinking of drinking something so dangerous. What if he hurts himself even more. "Hana, I can't recover from this." My head began to feel light and I couldn't think anymore. Saying something like that made me feel like air. "They say one of my lungs has been punctured and if I don't get the right medicine and doctors I would die in a few weeks."

"No, that can't be." I felt tears prick from behind my eyes and I couldn't think straight anymore. Heisuke pulled out a small bottle with the red liquid inside. His fingers moved to the cap of the bottle and opened it. "Wait Heisuke, think about this." He looked into my eyes once more before he moved towards me, pulling me into an embrace. A soft yet stern whisper following. "If I do turn evil.. kill me." His words hit like a rock and I could hear him swallow the fluid. I tried to stop him, but couldn't even move myself from his chest. I felt as if I was powerless again and it hurt me. As soon as he drank the potion he let go and backed away. His eyes were switching from his normal blue to red and it made my stomach turn. "Heisuke, why?" The same thing happened to me before. I was powerless then and I'm not much stronger now. How can he just decide to do this to me. Why isn't he thinking of the situation. His body had collapsed into the futon and his long brown hair switched to the all so familiar white. I didn't want to see at all. Heisuke stopped moving and I waited for something to happen. What was going on with him, Sannan turned into laughter when he had taken the water of life, why isn't Heisuke moving. "Heisuke.." As soon as I said his name his upper body flew upward. It surprised me, that I fell backwards knocking over the tray I had brought with me. As it fell to the ground the sound filled the ever so silent room.

My heart was pounding loudly in my chest I wasn't sure if I should move or not. I felt afraid that he might try the same thing Sannan did, but I couldn't face the fact that he told me to kill him if he did. "Heisuke, are you still there?" I was afraid to the point I was shaking, but I gathered enough bravery to move my hand towards him. It felt different and I knew something wasn't right, but I didn't want to believe it. "Heisu.." Before I could finish his name he took my stretched hand and pulled me towards him, his body moving upward and his other hand was reaching for my shoulder. His touch felt different from before. He placed his hand on my right shoulder and pushed me onto the ground. My head hitting the wooden floor. A shot of pain went through my body. My head hurt and as the blackness that covered my eyes disappeared, what I saw was Heisuke.

His blood red eyes staring down on me. I was scared, but not of him. I was scared that I had to kill him. "Heisuke, please turn back." I reached my hand out to touch his face, but he grabbed it before I could, pinning it next to me. "You're hurting me, Heisuke, please let go." I tried to act calm, but my voice was still shaking. He lowered his upper body bringing it closer to mine. He wasn't saying anything and I didn't know what I had to do. He had locked my eyes and he was close enough to let me feel his breath.

_"If I do turn evil.. kill me."_ Those words he told me, I couldn't act on them even if I had the strength. A tear escaped my eye and I saw Heisuke's eyes flinch. "Ha.. na.." Immediately after he said my name he collapsed his full body weight crashing down on me. I laid still for a moment taking in the event that had taken place. Heisuke had drank that weird potion, he wasn't fully Heisuke anymore, but yet he looked completely fine. Sleeping like nothing was ever wrong. I rolled him off me and placed him back into his futon. I wasn't sure of what to do anymore and picked up the fallen tray. As I looked I could see the bruises Heisuke left when he trapped me.

"I see now.." This familiar voice, Sannan. The cold hazel eyes of Sannan stared down on Heisuke's sleeping being. "What are you doing here." He gave a sly smile. "I thought I had improved the potion, yet it still had a side effect." Sannan walked towards the door he came in from. Walking outside he looked once more. Watching the confusion rise within me. Then he left, the room once again became quiet and everything seemed to be just a dream.

As I walked back to my room I spotted Ibuki training with some men of the shinsengumi. He looked like he enjoyed himself and I felt a burden lift from my heart. I should tell everyone what happened and try to make the best of it. Heisuke didn't die so that means he would be alright. I was happy yet sad at the same time.


	12. The Fear of Losing You

***…The Fear of Losing You…***

{August 1887, Early afternoon.}

I had asked to get everyone into our usual meeting room "Why are we here again." Okita was leaning against the wall as he sighed. "Be quiet and let her speak." Hijikata sat on his knees and waited for me to begin. "Heisuke drank the water of life." I came straight to the point. I wasn't going to hide anything since I felt guilty the most. "What!" Harada jumped and looked rather angry. "I'm sorry. I couldn't stop him." I looked to the ground. "What happened?" Hijikata was the one who found me with Sannan after Kazama had shown himself. He knew what that potion could do to a person. I didn't know where to begin, yet I told myself not to hide a thing. The room was fully focused on my story when the sliding doors flew open and Yamazaki stormed inside, casually followed by Sannan who walked into the darkest corner of the room.

"Heisuke has left, leaving only this." He knelt before Hijikata and gave him a piece of paper. Yamazaki was the one who normally kept the watch over Heisuke, but since I brought him food this time he left for a while. "I guess he left after he realized what he had done." Sannan came out of the corner and everyone looked back at him. The air felt tense as everyone remembered what happened. "Tell me Sannan, why are you here." Hijikata asked, his voice fierce and his eyes not breaking contact. Sannan nodded at the paper in Hijikata's hands and told him to read it. Slowly the sounds of rustling paper filled the room making the air around us even thicker.

"I'm sorry for everything, I won't be of much use anymore. Don't go looking for me, Heisuke." Hijikata watched the paper a few times more before placing it next to him. It was as if he accepted that Heisuke left and didn't want to be found. "Wait, are you saying that we should let him go?" I blurred out my thoughts after seeing everyone look down. Even his best friends are accepting the fact that he will not return. I don't want to believe they are satisfied with that. "He told us not to look for him, if he really wants to come back he will." Harada spoke and stretched his arms. They are all so calm about the fact he just turned into one of the enemies.

"Maybe he left after he realized what he had done to you… Hana." Finally Sannan began to speak out loud. He was the one who encouraged Heisuke to drink that potion, just to see what would happen. I glared at him as curious faces began to pop up. "What does he mean?" Harada began to look me over as if to find a flaw in my system. "You see, Heisuke's situation was terminal." Everyone had eyes growing wider by the second. I thought they knew about the situation. Maybe he didn't say anything to them so they wouldn't worry. "I came here to test my potion, he was the perfect subject." Without a warning Harada jumped up and grabbed Sannan by his collar. Even though it happened in a second, Sannan didn't move or even looked fazed by the fact that someone was about to beat him up. "I tried to adjust the faults in the potion I used on myself. I must say it did work out great, yet not how I had expected." Hijikata said nothing as he looked to the ground, his hair falling forward. The paper still laid there as if to keep us aware of the situation. "This time the potion didn't make the subject go bloodthirsty, it more or less got to the point where he wanted to have what he couldn't get."

Sannan gave a quick and piercing look towards Harada who let him go seconds after. Everyone was watching his movement and before I knew it he had reached me, pulling me up by the arm. It exposed the mark Heisuke had left on me just a bit earlier and I felt embarrassed by it. As Sannan held on strongly I watched as multiple people started to glare at the mark on my arm. For some reason marks and bumps seem to stay, while cuts and abrasions disappeared. It was strange, but I figured it was because with one there wasn't any blood involved. So no real harm, like an infection could take place. "Let her go." The ever so calm Hijikata spoke as I was thinking. Still feeling the heat of embarrassment over me, he let my arm go and I pulled it close to my chest. "Heisuke forced himself on you." Harada seemed to be the most effected he was looking angry and annoyed at the same time. I wasn't going to say he did, since nothing really happened, but if you looked at it from their point of view I could see what they were thinking. "It.. it wasn't like that." I pointed out to ease the mood. It didn't seem to work and even the always so calm Saito had traces of annoyance in his face. "We have to find him, he might be in danger." I really did feel sorry for Heisuke. It felt as if I was the cause of this to happen.

"Idiot!" Harada surprised me by grabbing my shoulders and forcing me to look at him. "You were attacked by him and you still try to think of him like nothing happened!" Harada seemed to be annoyed by the fact that I still felt like I had to protect him. His amber eyes narrowing and looking straight into mine. His eyebrow was twitching of annoyance when Shinpachi placed a hand on his shoulder making him back off. "Harada, you can't blame her." He sounded surprisingly mature. All this time I heard him talk was more on the level of a teenager, even though he had already passed that time long ago. His actions were showing the age he wanted to relive. "Heisuke is still our friend, even though he drank that potion we can't rule him out yet." I felt as if Shinpachi was trying to comfort both himself and Harada. They are close friends and with one of them changing it must have been hard on them. I gave a brief smile before shaking of Harada's hand. "I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I can't let him walk in the streets alone, not now he.. changed." Everyone kept quiet. They must be thinking about the fact that Heisuke could turn evil anytime. His appearance may be the same, but it was the potion that could strike any moment and turn him evil.

{August 1887, Afternoon.}

I was told to remain in my room for now while the others were looking for Heisuke, when Ibuki's voice came from behind the door. "Hana, what are you doing inside?" Ibuki's worried voice was nothing more than troubling for me. What do I need to say to him that would make all the things happening to me and everyone in the shinsengumi easy to understand. As he slid open the door I could hear his soft feet approach me. "I just don't feel that good." I was looking outside at birds nesting. It must feel wonderful to be in love. To have someone care so much about you that they will build a home only for you. I know the animal world is different than ours, but it doesn't stray too much. "Are you sick?" He sat beside me and brought his hand to my forehead, feeling the temperature. "It doesn't seem you have a fever." I knew that that wasn't the case, I must be feeling down from everything that had happened. I curled my lips to a smile. "Don't worry." It didn't come out reassuring and Ibuki caught on to it. His eyes looked over me just like Harada had been doing a moment earlier. He was searching for anything that might made me feel sick. After a while he gave up and placed his hand on my head, a shot of pain ran through me and I crimped in one another. "What's wrong!" Ibuki immediately pulled back and his face looked worried. I guess the time Heisuke pushed me down had left a bump on my head. "I.. it's nothing, I just have a bump on my head." I felt Ibuki's worry lift from his shoulders and he smiled. "I thought that I might have hurt you." Ibuki worries way to much sometimes, but that makes him the way he is. He is much like his father in that matter.

"Ibuki, I have to tell you something.." I felt like I was lying to him. It felt wrong to not have him know about my secret and that of the shinsengumi, now he is a part of the group. Ibuki waited patiently in silence. His long raven black hair falling behind his back and a pair of amazing brown eyes staring into mine. I hardly knew where to begin my story. "Do you remember when I fell from a tree years ago, how there was blood on my knee yet no wound." Ibuki thought back at the past and I could see him remembering the incident. "Well it is so that my wounds heal quickly, I told you back then that it must have been some berries or paint lying around, but that wasn't true." Ibuki's face looked as if he already knew. On his face formed a slightly remorseful smile. "I already know." This surprised me. How can he know something I held a secret for all my life. "I'm not stupid, I had it figured out after that incident, I told your mother and she told me about you." I couldn't believe the fact that he figured it out so easily. Why did mother tell him, was it so that he would move away from me. "Why didn't you tell me?" I waited for an answer, but before I could even think further about it he pulled me into an embrace. It surprised me even further and I couldn't move. "I held it a secret since you wouldn't tell me directly." He pulled me in even closer, almost to the point to felt like breaking in half. "I was afraid that you would leave when I did.." He paused a moment pulling me back, a pair of glimmering brown eyes waiting for approval. He slightly smiled and brought his warm loving fingers to my cheek, softly caressing it. It tickled a little as he moved on with his story. "I didn't want to lose the smile you gave me every day, the voice that called out to me when I wasn't expecting it and more importantly.." His words were full of warmth, but I couldn't figure out why he was saying all this, we were friends for so long, why would he tell such passionate things now. "..I was afraid of losing you." I couldn't think and only stared right back, what was I supposed to say.


	13. Kiss Of A Demon

***…Kiss of a Demon…***

{August 1887, Afternoon.}

The room was filled with an eerie silence. Even the birds outside became quiet. Ibuki saw my troubled face and began to smile brightly. "I'm glad nothing bad happened when I wasn't with you." He tried to fool me by acting like he always did, but I could see through his act like an open book. His feelings were somewhat hurt by my reaction to his words. I was sure of it, but I couldn't help my surprise when he told me. "Ibuki, I'm sorry." I apologized without even thinking about it. I wasn't sure why I said it either. His face kept smiling yet I could see underneath he was feeling down. I wasn't sure of the words he said to me, but it sounded a lot like words from a lover. My heart was racing yet it wasn't something I could feel good about. I was feeling as if he broke my heart instead of him entering mine. At the same time it made me feel sad about what I was thinking. "Don't be. I knew you never looked at me the way I did to you, if you did you would have already noticed." For him to tell me such word was as painful for me as it was for him. No one ever confessed something like this to me before, yet I never thought about it as well. My heart wasn't ready for this feeling, I wanted to do so much before I would settle myself with a man that I could love. I turn out to be quit sad.

"I know this is mean of me to ask, but.." Placing both hands on his crossed legs, Ibuki sighed. "Can we still remain as always." It warmed my heart to hear those words, but it still felt a bit awkward. "Yes, please." Was my answer. The air around us seemed to lift the eerie aura it had been given a moment ago. We kept quiet for a long time, just sitting there thinking about everything. Both of us stared out of the window following the birds in their nest. It felt appropriate to watch them build their lives. "I heard that Heisuke left the shinsengumi, why?" It pulled me out of my train of thoughts and back to reality. Of course Ibuki wouldn't know about it he wasn't there and no one had told him anything. He was basically a bystander that got involved. I know I should have gotten permission first, but I told him everything that had happened to me from the day I came into contact with the shinsengumi. The day I met those monsters, the killing and the attempted kidnapping, how I found out about the water of life, the man called Misukatse Hanabi that I wasn't even getting close to finding. Ibuki sat there in silence for a moment taking in all that I had said. "So does that mean you turn evil the moment you drink the potion?" was startled by his response. He took everything and answered so calmly. Maybe he isn't the kid I used to know anymore. The one that was always hiding behind his father when he could. But I knew he had his strong points. The fact that he always tried to protect me even though he didn't stand a chance as a kid. I didn't know how to feel about him anymore. We weren't kids any longer, we had both grown into adults that had separate things to find and protect. I shook my head. "No, I don't think it will last long either. You do turn into a monster sometimes, but I have never seen anyone turn into something that wasn't human before, except the things I had encountered on my first day." I knew Ibuki felt a bit annoyed I could see it in his eyes. "Why are you saying it as if all this is normal. You should act more girly, saying things like 'Kyaa' and blush a bit more." Again with the response I wasn't looking for. He was avoiding every question even though he was the one asking them. "I have to go.." He said and immediately stood up walking towards the door. Before he walked out he turned to face me with a smile. "If you ever need help, know that I will always choose you first."

{August 1887, Evening.}

The time ticked as I watched the sun go down. I felt like going crazy not doing a thing. I was told not to leave my room, but I couldn't stay put anymore. I have to go search for Heisuke. I stumble awkwardly through the compound, being as sneaky as I can be. If someone spotted me I would be sent back to my room and that was the opposite of what I wanted to do. As I turn around a corner I hear the voices of two familiar people. "I don't want to say I don't trust him anymore, but I can't forget what Sannan said." The voice of Harada, he sounds a little angry yet he was trying his best to think positive. "Maybe we teased him too much." Shinpachi sighed. I wasn't trying to overhear what they were saying and I decided it was best to move on. I hurriedly ran towards the exit and began to walk over to where I thought Heisuke was going to be. My heart was racing from all the running and I finally got to the point I sank into the ground. "Where could he be…" I felt responsible for him leaving. It hit me that whatever Heisuke did I always felt as if I was to blame. I felt powerless again and scared. Why am I so weak, why can't I be stronger? Air filled my lungs as I inhaled everything I could find as air around me. I must find Heisuke and resolve this wired misunderstanding. My legs gathered all their strength and lifted me up. They hurt from all the running, but I decided to ignore it completely. If he wasn't in the city he must be somewhere outside of it. The sky began to redden even more as I entered the small forest around Kyoto. The woods began to cast shadows that seemed to be moving. The sounds of the animals came to a stop, to make place for all the nightlife. It felt more and more like I was going to walking into something I didn't want to see. I could hear my heartbeat drumming through my head and I felt a faint pain in my left foot. It must be hurt from all that running. As I looked desperately around me I realized I wouldn't be able to find what I was looking for, until I spotted something familiar on the ground. I took a closer look and spotted a brown bundle of long hair. The ends all tied together, waiting for someone to watch it. Some dark thoughts crossed my mind as I was sure that hair was Heisuke's. Why did he cut his long hair? The moment I began to question everything I could hear the sounds of a struggle. A moan followed by clashing of swords. I didn't think for that moment and stood up racing towards the sound, hoping to find the person I was so desperately looking for. A I opened the curtain of leaves I was dazzled by the sight before me. A group of strong looking men had all been surrounding a man that looked a lot like Heisuke, only his hair was so short I could hardly make him for who he really was. "Bastard!" One of the men screamed and they all sprinted towards Heisuke who dodged it like it was all just a game to him. Heisuke didn't have a sword nor anything else to protect himself with. He was wearing the white yakuta that the doctor gave him. "Got you!" One of them spoke and slashed Heisuke's right arm till the point of bleeding. The air immediately turned grim. Even the men were confused for a moment. I was sure something bad was coming, but I couldn't place what it was. Then it hit me. "Heisuke!" I saw his hair turn white as he gripped his stomach to suppress the pain. His eyes were turning red again, just like this morning. "What the hell is going…" Before he could finish his sentence, he got launched from the field and into a tree close by. The pure killing aura had set the scene into a state of confusion and fear. Heisuke had turned. I felt the men around him tremble in fear. They weren't about to give up though and slashed forward, giving Heisuke no time to think. But he didn't have to in one motion he pushed the swords to the side and began hitting the unarmed men around him. Most of them decided to flee, but with the speed Heisuke had they didn't stand a chance. "W.. Wait!" One of them begged for his life. "I don't want to die, Please!" It pained me to see Heisuke not hearing his pain and suffering. This wasn't the normal Heisuke, this was the one that had no feelings, no emotions and didn't give anything about human lives. "Stop! Heisuke!" As he was standing with his glassy eyes pointed at the men he was ready to kill, I stepped out from the shadows. "Heisuke stop doing this." I felt fear creep up, but swallowed it standing in front of the grounded men. Spreading my arms as if I could protect him with just my body. "Please don't you think they learned their lesson." I wasn't getting through to him, he was still looking like an animal hunting his prey. "Please Heisuke, don't blame yourself." I was trying to let him see he was just not the one to blame. Not for this nor for the time he pushed me down. It was all Sannan's fault. He gave him that bottle and told him to drink it if he wanted to live. "It wasn't you Heisuke, think about it, Sannan gave you that bottle, you have to get back to normal."

I didn't know what to say anymore. I was glad he stopped his murder spree, but he wasn't going back to the normal Heisuke and it confused me. Why wouldn't he turn back. Last time it took a few l minutes and he was his normal self again, yet he has been in this form for a while now._ "He wanted to have what he couldn't..."_ Sannan's word came to me like a light at the end of a tunnel. Does it mean he wants to feel a woman's warmth? It took me a few seconds to realize what that meant. He is still just a boy, of course he would be curious, yet he grew up to fast within the shinsengumi. In this time and age there was nothing to prevent that I believe. "Heisuke, please don't let this haunt you. I lowered my arms and stepped a little closer to him. He wasn't far and i could practically touch his chest already. Heisuke didn't move nor flinch for that matter, he looked down on me as if I was just a bug. "I'm sorry Heisuke, but I have to try something…" I lifted my heels and pressed my hands onto his chest, bringing my lips to his. I was a bit nervous, since it would be my first, but I closed my eyes and pressed my lips onto his. A soft warmth filling my body. "Mmh, What is this…"


	14. Feelings

***…Feelings…***

{August 1887, Evening.}

It felt soft as I opened my eyes and watched Heisuke turn back to normal. His brilliant white hair that once swayed in the wind is now short and turning back to his original brown color. His eyes that stood out as red rubies calmed down and closed softly. I noticed then, that he was kissing me back. His arms falling over my small shoulders and pulling me in closer. I wasn't sure of what to do. Was I happy he was kissing me, did I want this? The questions began to replay in my head, but I had no answer.

Then without a warning Heisuke collapsed into the ground. His body not moving as I spoke his name. I didn't move to the surprise of him falling, my mind was still wandering about the kiss. "Heisuke.." I felt a little scared, was he injured that he collapsed like that? As my consciousness regained I fell next to him on my knees. "Heisuke!" I grabbed his shoulders shaking him. I felt the fear creep over me as I watched him lie lifeless on the ground. "Get up, Heisuke.." I was panicking to much that I didn't notice the presence that had revealed itself. "This has become quite interesting." I turn towards the voice. A familiar and unpleasant face looks down on me from his height. Blonde hair swaying in the wind as red glittering eyes begin to narrow. "It's time I take you with me." As he reached his hand towards me I jump back revealing my sword. It was Kazama that had appeared and I knew it had to be bad news.

"What are you doing here, Kazama!" My voice was still shaking from the happening, but I tried to hide it the best way I could. By glaring at my enemy. "Hearing you say my name brings some warmth to my heart." His words didn't make any sense to me. Even though I held him at the tip of my sword he looked so calm and sure of himself. "I won't go with you." I said and a sly smile began to appear on Kazama's face. He leaped towards me and held onto my katana. His grip was strong and he didn't let go. A small stream of blood began to drip down the end of the katana, but Kazama didn't budge. He must have felt the sting of the blade opening his skin, but he was unfazed and looking directly into my eyes.

"I don't need your permission to kidnap you, Hana." My emotions where in a twist. I felt anger and fear, but mostly I felt the need to save Heisuke. He was my number one priority and I wasn't going to give up on him.

As if my body moved on its own I let go of the sword and leaped back. I stood strongly facing the enemy before me. I knew I was truly outmatched, but I didn't want to give in. Kazama did seem to be a little faced by my actions, but he regained his posture and let the sword fall to the ground. His hand moved towards his lips and he began to lick the blood of his hand. Dark red eyes began to look my way and I felt a shiver come down my spine.

This reminded me of when he attacked us, when Ibuki saved our lives. When he told me I was, just like him, a demon. Someone powerful even. Then it hit me. If I was indeed a demon that means I could hold great power. Meaning I may stand a chance, but I had no idea of what to do. "Are you trying to fight me." Kazama seemed to be amused by my actions and let his hand drop next to his body. "I am going to fight you!" I looked around for something that could replace my sword. A stick about as thick as a wooden training sword was lying a little further from my feet. I felt the need to grab it, but I wasn't sure if I could make it as far. I had no choice but to try. With one quick motion I moved down and touched the stick with my hand, but before I could get a strong grip on it a pair of large hands held onto mine. "A wife should not oppose her husband." With one quick pull he had me standing and leaning against a tree. Without the strength to push him off, I was once again powerless. He held on to my arms as I tried to fight my way out of his grip. As soon as I realize I stood no chance I stopped and glared up at his face. "Let go of me." I demanded, but only the side of his mouth curled up a bit. "I told you to let me go." I tried to give a quick move to get free, but it failed.

My eyes strayed towards Heisuke's body. He was still lying on the ground, not moving. His back was slowly rising, meaning he was still breathing at least. With a sign of life I let out the breath I was holding. "Don't be relieved yet, I'm still not finished with him." I looked back at Kazama's eyes, they stood darker then before and glared over towards Heisuke. "Don't hurt him!" I plead. The look in his eyes were that of someone ready to take a life and I didn't want Heisuke to die. "He made a move on something that doesn't belong to him, he will pay for that." The Kazama before me was different than the one I had seen before. This one was talking more and had a different way of speaking, his eyes were more violent. "Are you saying that I belong to you?" My question even surprised me. It came out like I was unaware of anything that was happening. Kazama's eyes switched to me in a slow movement and locked onto them. "It's time to go." At first I was confused, but I noticed that he was really going to take me to where he wanted. I was way weaker than him, yet I was also a demon.

"Stop right there!" The female voice of someone I didn't quite recognized filled the silence. Once I heard the voice a strong wind passed us and as if Kazama heard the most deathly noise he let go of me and clicked his tongue. "Kazama, leave. Now!" Her voice was powerful and Kazama obeyed as if she was his master. He left leaving nothing but the tingly feeling of his presence behind. "Are you alright?" Her voice was smaller and softer, then I remembered. "Sen?" Her bright eyes and cheery personality were now visible. I felt both glad and surprised at her visit. "What are you doing here?" I asked, her smile bright as if it was still day. "Aren't you glad I came to save you?" I shook my head and apologized. Of course I was happy, but I didn't want to be a burden. "Let us take you back home." The other woman came and lifted Heisuke up as if he was just a small child.

The moment we set foot inside the compound everyone ran towards us. Both happy and concerned looks on their faces. "Hana, thank god.." Ibuki ran towards me and waited a few seconds a little hesitant before embracing me fully and sighing into my hair. The feeling felt as if I could rely on him again. as if anything he said that night didn't happen. I was still shocked at his confession, but I couldn't help but feel differently. It felt different from the feeling I felt when Heisuke left and when he was injured. I felt as if my world could crumble down if I didn't held him. Then I remembered the kiss. I kissed him when he was going berserk would he even remember, did it even mean anything when he kissed back?

As Ibuki let go I looked towards Heisuke. He was being brought to a room to recover. This day was way too intense. My energy was at its lowest and all I wanted to do was sleep.


	15. Another Note

Hello!

I'm so happy people keep reading this!

If you want to read it in better quality then check out story/6148086/Aku-No-Hana/ It's still in the beginning of the story but I will update every Friday!

So yes from now on this story will focus more on the Heisuke love route!  
Of course there will be the extra romances of Harada and Kazama!  
Sen and Kimikiku are also place here now and I will make sure that Sannan will get more screen time!

More secrets will be revealed and the search for our mystery man will continue!

Don't forget to Leave a comment and Have Fun reading!

Love,

Mikira Nanami!


	16. Stronger Than Ever

***…Stronger Than Ever …***

{September 1887, Morning.}

At night I had stayed with my mind filled of thoughts, how was I supposed to face Heisuke once he had awoken. What was I supposed to say. My mind was filled with thoughts of him, would he be alright, would he be afraid. I was both worried as concerned.

"Hana, We're going on a run, it's going to be a long one, so be careful." Ibuki and Hijikata, together with a few others were leaving. They wore their uniform suggesting it could lead into a battle. The only once left at the compound would be Harada, Heisuke and a few fellow soldiers. Not only that, but Sen and the woman named Kimikiku also stayed behind while delivering both Heisuke and me. I had known them from the festival, that time I could dress as a woman again. they were so nice and cheerful it made me forget I was targeted and looking for someone. Now that I think about it, I haven't made any progress on the search for Misukatse Hanabi. I didn't even know if he was still alive. I sighed at the thought of looking for a death man. A flash of guild reaching my heart. My mother was still at home. Her body unresponsive and I was here worrying about myself. Ibuki told me she was fine, but I still wanted to get it over with fast. Even though this place became something like my home I wanted to return back to my real one.

My thoughts swayed as I was wiping the ground of leaves. The area went quiet and it felt lonely. "Miss Hana." Kimikiku showed up from the corner of the yard and made a little bow her long black hair falling over her shoulders. She was beautiful and smart. Her curves were showing in her ninja like outfit and her bright purple eyes. I noticed the men here looking at her often. I was a little jealous that she could show everything without feeling any shame. "Sen-Hime asked for you."

With a small knock on the door I was lead into the room Sen had been given. "Hana, welcome. I had wanted to talk with you." Kimikiku left the room as soon as Sen began to talk. She had her colorful kimono on with her short ponytails hanging over her shoulders. "I presume you have already figured the state you are in." She placed a cup of tea in my hands and took a sip of her own. Her light brown eyes piercing mine. "He said I was a demon, a rare one and that I held powers.." I spoke out loud I wanted to know everything and how to control it. "Yes, female demons like us are rare, the whole demon clan is a rare found, but even so.." Taking another sip of her tea she continued. "We have to help each other. I as your elder should help you stand up for yourself. I may not look it, but I have lived many lives. I have powers you can only dream of and this power will all be yours when you finish your training."

"You're going to train me?" She nodded and put down the teacup. "Yes, I have to. Kazama chikage, the man that will stop at nothing to possess you will come again. you have to at least be able to do something more than glare at him." A slight blush of embarrassment flashed my face. "You saw that." She smiled slightly and took a deep breath. "Dear, I know everything. Your mother's illness the man you are looking for, the drug that turns ordinary humans into monsters and Heisuke Toudou.." At her last words I stopped drinking my tea and looked her in the eyes. She knows everything. That means that time she saw us, me kissing him. My stomach felt as if it dropped to the ground. I was embarrassed and confused, but shook it off, was it a crime to kiss someone?

"Dear, You are a full blood demon. Your body and powers are wasted on that human. Now he has taken the drug he will only hurt everything you loved and hold dear. He will destroy your feelings and your soul. Think about it.." She sounded desperate and I felt guild rise again. I wasn't even sure of my own feelings yet and she was already making him into the bad guy. "I'm sorry, but Heisuke wouldn't do something like that. He is kind and, like me, still just a kid." Her smile darkened and she stood up. "Hana, let us just focus on your powers for now."

{September 1887, Night.}

The moon was out and the stars of Kyoto were visible. It looked peaceful and it calmed my nerves. "Alright, miss Hana, we have to focus on your figure first." Kimikiku stood before me dressed in the outfit she wore in the morning. I was given the same and it felt easy to move in yet a bit embarrassing. "Place both your feet at the center on your body. Balance is the first step." As I did she began throwing small balls of cloth towards me and I had to dodge them without falling. It was hard, but as soon as I felt at ease I could almost feel where the movements were coming from. Closing my eyes I could feel every bit of wind passing and all the footsteps on the ground. It felt powerful, I felt powerful. It made me feel confident and proud. "Alright, I think you have a great idea of what we mean by power now." Sen showed from the side and greeted us. "So my power can tell what is coming my way. What is happening a little further from me?" She nodded and picked up a wooden sword. "This time I want you to fight. Only feeling what's coming isn't enough. You have to be strong enough to fight your opponent.

A few strikes and trips later Sen stopped and smiled kindly at me. "I think it's enough for now. Power comes with time and practice. Rest now and we will continue this another time." I hadn't even been able to keep the sword in my hands. I was defeated almost instantly. I sighed and walked towards my room. It was frustrating yet I found my feelings chance the more I thought of Sen's words. _'Practice and time..' _All that will make me stronger, but will it be enough and will it be in time. The door next to me slide open in a hurry. Revealing The evenly shocked face of Heisuke. Our eyes met and I felt a huge burden lift from my shoulders. 'He's fine, he's still alright.' I thought and inhaled the air I was missing. "Heiskue, you're alright. Thank goodness. Please don't leave again, I was worried and so were the others.." I rambled on the words as Heisuke began to calm down and soften.

"Hana.." His voice cut me off and I stayed still. "I'm sorry.." He said again. he was sorry, for what? He drunk that potion so he could fight for his friends. He was stronger than I had thought. I never thought about it in that way until now. "I'm sorry for hurting you. For hurting the others.." I smiled at his fallen face and placed my hand on his left arm. "You didn't hurt me Heisuke, nor the others. If more you just made us worry." His big blue eyes stared into my dull brown ones and gave a small glimmer. "How do you feel?" I asked to break the silence. He placed a hand behind his head. Feeling his short brown hair and looking down. "At first I was scared. My feelings were ten times more powerful. I couldn't handle it then and I don't think I can now, but it felt powerful, I felt indestructible.." He looking back into my eyes and his expression chanced into a serious one. "I felt stronger than ever. Ready to take on the world. Ready to take anything I wanted even if it meant hurting people.." I felt his pain and my stomach made a jump. What was tis feeling, it felt ticklish and happy, but it felt out of place. "But I don't want to turn into that man anymore. I don't know how to control it. I'm afraid of it, I'm afraid of doing something I regret."

"You can train with me." I bluntly spoke and my cheeks turned red. What was I saying I didn't even know if it would work and I was unsure if Sen and Kimikiku would even want that. "I mean.. I'm training so I can become stronger, you can train with me, try to control it so you don't have to be afraid anymore." I keep rambling my thoughts and forget to even breath. My mind was trying to make him forget the hurt he had put himself in and I was trying to make me forget he was hurt. "I think you can try training, even I can do it." I laughed and waited for a response, but all I got was silence. Once I looked up I was faced with the sad face of Heisuke. My heart sank into my shoes and I felt like crying. "What is it.." It was soft and I could hardly hear myself. "Thank you.. I never had someone worry about me like this before.." He spoke in a soft and caring voice. "My parents left me here when I was still a child. They wanted me to be strong and fight for what I thought was right. They left me.." I found it rare to hear stories from others. Normally they would just tense up and laugh it off, but he opened up to me. I felt happy and sad at the same time. "No." I said strongly. I don't think his parents left him. They wanted him to stay save and get stronger. They wanted him to live the life he wanted even though it was with strangers. "Heisuke, do you like it here?" Heisuke looked confused and shocked, but nodded. "this was my dream, to be strong and help the once in need. I'm more than happy here, this is my home." I gave him a bright smile. "This is what they wanted. Your parents knew you wanted to help others, they wanted you to be happy can't you see that?" Heisuke's eyes light up and guild struck his face. "They knew.." He began to smile and shook his head. "I'm so stupid.." Then he laughed and took a deep sigh. "You always seem to cheer me up.." His hand reached out for me and wrapped around my shoulders. With a small pull I landed into his chest and got squeezed. "You know.." His voice was lower and I felt his breath on my neck. "I feel like I can count on you. You're here for everyone, you always smile.." The embrace began to tighten and I was unsure of what to do again. "You feel like the sun that warms everyone, thank you.."


	17. Broken Trust

***…Broken Trust …***

{September 1887, Night.}

"You feel like the sun that warms everyone, thank you." My heart warms at the words and I can't help but smile a little. Now his words warm me like the sun, how funny. His grip begins to tighten even more and I felt my back hurting. "Heisuke.." A few pain shot through my back. "You.. not that tight.." I can hardly utter my words anymore. "Hana, I'm sorry. I'm still sorry for what happened when I drank the potion, for hurting you.." He went back to the beginning. "Heisuke.."

"You're hurting me now.." I shifted in my stand and tried to get free, but he didn't let go or weaken. Before I could speak more a quick pull and a point of a spear to Heisuke's neck was stopping what was going on. Both Heisuke's eyes as mine widened in shock and as I looked to my left I saw Harada with an angry face pointing his spear at Heisuke. He looked both annoyed and worried, but it wasn't rage. "What are you doing, Heisuke." He said calmly and his eyes narrowed. His hand protectively around my shoulders as he pulled me closer. "Uh.. Harada?" He glanced down at me and his expression softened. "Did he do anything? Are you hurt?" Not lowering his spear he asked the questions. I shook my head notifying it was alright. "Ha.. Harada, I.. I didn't do anything.."

"Stop it!" Harada lowered his spear and rubbed his temples, before grabbing Heisuke's collar and dragging him in front of his face. "Do you even know what you did?" He radiated something that resembled anger, but it wasn't quite like it. It felt like he was hurt and betrayed. "Do you even care what you did?" Heisuke didn't say a word and only looked at the ground. Of course he must care for what he did. He told me he was sorry, I could see the solitude in his eyes when he told me. He was hurt and lonely he didn't know what to do. "You attacked her because you thought it was a good idea to drink a potion that would turn you into a monster!" Harada stopped to breath and looked over at me. "Heisuke, why should I trust you?" His eyes closed and he gave a big sigh before letting go of his collar. "You are my friend, I have always trusted you with my life, but now I don't know what to do.." His hands began ruffling his hair and he crouched down. "Why did you do it?" Looking back up he noticed that Heisuke had turned around. His back towards us as he placed his hands behind his head.

"Sano, I had no choice. I couldn't die from a stupid injury. I have to keep fighting, for everyone." His voice was weak and I could feel the hurt inside it, but what was I to do in a situation like this. They are best friends and have known each other for so long. I couldn't interfere in this. "I'm sorry for what I did. I know I shouldn't have done it when she was with me, but I didn't want to be alone.." Harada stood back up and placed his spear next to him on the ground. "I'm so selfish yet I don't know how to stop." An eerie silence filled the next few moment before Harada decided it was enough and stumbled of. I was left with my thoughts as Heisuke closed the door on me. This felt horrible. I couldn't do anything and I was powerless to see who was hurt the most. Being betrayed by a friend must feel like a shot in the heart. If Ibuki did what Heisuke had done, how would I react. Would I be the same?

I began walking, I had to know what Harada felt like right now. He wasn't that far and I knew I had to find answers. I spotted the spear of Harada stick out from a corner and walked over to him. "Harada?" He was sitting on the ground looking towards the moon that shone out in the garden. "Can I sit next to you?" He didn't speak a word just stared out into the night sky. I felt like this silence could both kill us if it kept going any longer. "Heisuke didn't mean to hurt you." I began, this got Harada's attention even though he wasn't quite sure if he wanted to listen. His long reddish hair that was placed in a low ponytail waved with the wind as he turned towards me. "He just wanted to help you guys, he wasn't ready to give up fighting.." Harada stared with his dark amber eyes into what felt like my soul. His stare was so strong I felt like I could cry at any moment. "Don't blame him too much.." I was still feeling this awkward silence and I sighed. Harada didn't stray from his staring and I felt a bit uncomfortable.

"Why do you keep protecting him?" I looked down at the wood we were sitting on. Why was I? "Don't you have a dream, Harada?" A low chuckle left his troth and I looked back. "Maybe you like it.." Not quite getting his words I tilted my head in confusion. What was he talking about, liking what? A quick wind blew the lose strings of my curly brown hair into my face. The next thing I knew I was lying on the wooden floor, my right hand trapped between the ground and a strong male hand. I blinked a few times to adjust to the sudden change. Harada's dark amber eyes were only inches away from mine and I held on to my breath. "Maybe you like to be pushed down by a man, to feel powerless against his grip.." My heart fluttered. This was different from Heisuke's body. Harada felt stronger and more violent. "Harada.." Only his name could escape from my mouth. I was perplexed at his sudden change. Why would he be doing this, wasn't he supposed to be the good guy. His face turned into a smile and his eyes closed for a second.

"I do have a dream.." He spoke opening his dark amber eyes once again. "I dream of a normal life, I want to settle down with the woman I love. I want to start a family.." He sounds so sad when he says it. "But all I'm good at is killing people." With my free hand I reached his shoulder. I wanted to comfort him, he was in as much pain as any other. He felt the change Heisuke went through, he saw his friend turn into a monster I was selfish to think I would be the only one effected. "You're not just good at killing.." I said not really knowing what to say. Harada turned his gaze towards me and kept his eyes on mine. I gave him a reassuring smile and went on. "Harada, you have a wonderful dream, you are good with kids and you are really kind to others. You know what you're doing when you want someone to smile. Don't say you're only good at killing, because you aren't. Harada you are great, kind and strong." His eyes widen at my speech and I felt the burden lift from my shoulders. I had a real smile on my face as I remembered Harada playing with the few kids that once entered the compound. He felt like an older brother to them, he was kind and played along with their games. "Hana, you are way to kind to people.." Surprised at his sudden claim I stopped and stared. I don't think I'm that kind. "You are always letting me feel better, but you get treated like this.." He points at the marks on my wrist, slowly trailing it to the end. It tickles and I change my position. "Why do you keep letting me feel this way.." Not knowing how to answer I wait for more explanation. "When it comes to you I have this feeling I have to protect you.."

"You don't have to anymore, I will get stronger so I can fight for myself." Harada's eyes close at my claim, almost like he thought of it as a joke. I am sure I can become stronger. I will get stronger I just need to train. Harada didn't really listen to the answer I spoke out. "Hana, you know you are more popular than you think. No one sees you as just a lady in need. We want to help you, protect you and be with you." He softly said the last few words and then locked his eyes fully into mine. "I can't bear the thought of you getting hurt by someone. I won't be able to handle it."

I felt exposed and a little bashful. Him saying those words was a little strange. I haven't gotten the chance to really know him yet, but it seems that almost everyone knows how and who I am. They know who I am and what I do, but it seems I still have no clue who the people protecting me are. I'm a bit ashamed of myself now. "Don't give me that look.." Harada saw my expression chance into something sad. Maybe I was overthinking everything like usual. "Don't worry, I will protect you no matter what happens to me.." He lowered his face closer to mine and I shut my eyes in reflex. A soft touch on the front of my forehead made my eyes open once again. His face was so close I could see the little hairs on his chin. A soft, warm breath tickled my skin as he slowly moved back, looking into my reddened face. He gave me a small smile before moving away from me and leaving. I was a bit startled, but it also warmed my heart.


	18. IMPORTANT UPDATE!

Dear readers,

It's been a while since I've updated a part for this story.

This is mainly because I started to worry about my school grades.

Anyhow I have begun to get back at it. ^^

Oh and I will now post it on another site:

*I begun to write it again and on wattpad is a story with the same name, Aku no Hana, by MikiraNanami. Same as here, though on wattpad it's hard getting readers. -_-

*The story will not continue here, but I first have to begin from scratch since I've been away for a while… I apologize for that. I will update the first rewritten chapter here so you can get an idea of what is going on in wattpad!

Don't forget to leave feedback and some thoughts of the current chapters uploaded, what would you like to be changed and what should stay the same.

(I won't change to much, but just enough to make the story more enjoyable and easy to read. I felt like there was too much confusion and it was going too fast. Here we go and thank you for listening.)

Mikira Nanami


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